Truth or Dare!
by Rdyest
Summary: Ever wanted to dare your favourite Bleach characters to do wild and insane things? Or ask them bizarre questions? Well now's your chance! Just leave a review with your dare in it, and in the next chapter your dare will appear! have fun ;p
1. Chapter 1

AN: I don't own Bleach =(

This is my first go at something like this, so please enjoy ^^ I got the idea off my friend charliechick who has done one of these for Ouran High, so you should read that too!!

Razz: Hello, and welcome to Truth or Dare!!

Ichigo: What?

Razz: Shh, I'm being introductory.

Ichigo: …

Razz: Anyways, let's begin… basically, people will leave reviews either daring, or asking a character to do something!

Orihime: Really! That sounds like fun!!

Razz: …**shifty eyes…** Yes…

Ichigo: I don't like the sound of this…

Kris: But its great fun!!

Ichigo: Who are you?

Kris: Your worst nightmare! …**evil laugh…**

Razz: Actually, she's my friend, but today she will be giving the first dare, take it away Kris!

Kris: I dare Aizen… **Aizen appears to hear his fate … **

Kris:** …**to put on the high school girl uniform, put Wonderweiss on his shoulders; push Ishida and Ichigo around in a wheelbarrow and sing the Munchkin song from the Wizard of Oz as loud as he can!

Aizen: … You have got to be kidding me!

Razz: No, this is actually pretty normal for Kris, you're in for it Aizen!

Aizen: I won't do it.

Razz: You will, and you will do it with a smile on your face! **…points finger menacingly in Aizen's face…**

Ichigo: Wait! If it's his dare, how come I have to do something too?

Razz: Oh stop complaining, go and fetch Ishida, he has to participate as well.

Wonderweiss: ???

Aizen: But I don't want to…

Razz: Too bad …**hits him on the head with a stick… **Wonderweiss! Fetch us a wheelbarrow

Wonderweiss: **finds**

Moments later the participants are gathered and organised. Aizen is forced into the girl's uniform, with much kicking and screaming, Ichigo and Ishida are squished into a wheel barrow that would normally only hold small children and Wonderweiss is positioned on top of Aizen.

Razz: **...looks…** Bwahahaha!

Aizen: **glares**

Razz: Off you go then.

Aizen frowns some more and then reluctantly grabs the wheelbarrow and pushes it around.

Wonderweiss: Wheee!

Razz: Remember to sing!

Aizen: Come out, come out wherever you are  
And meet the young lady who fell from a star  
She fell from the sky, she fell very far  
And Kansas she says is the name of the star

Kansas she says is the name of the star

She brings you good news, or haven't you heard  
When she fell out of Kansas a miracle occurred

It really was no miracle  
What happened was just this:  
The wind began to switch the house to pitch  
And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch  
Just then the witch, to satisfy an itch  
Went flying on her broomstick thumbing for a hitch

And oh what happened then was rich

The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch  
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch  
Which was not a healthy situation for the wicked witch

The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch  
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch  
Which was not a healthy situation for the wicked witch  
Who began to twitch, and was reduced to just a stitch  
Of what was once the wicked witch

We thank you very sweetly for doing it so neatly

You've killed her so completely  
That we thank you very sweetly

Let the joyous news be spread  
The wicked, old witch at last is dead

Ding-dong the witch is dead  
Which old witch? The wicked witch  
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead  
Wake up you sleepyhead  
Rub your eyes, get out of bed  
Wake up the wicked witch is dead  
She's gone where the goblins go  
Below - below - below  
Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out  
Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low  
Let them know the Wicked Witch is dead

As mayor of the Munchkin City  
In the county of the land of Oz  
I welcome you most regally

But we've got to verify it legally  
To see...

To see...

If she...

If she...

Is morally, ethically

Spiritually, physically

Positively, absolutely

Undeniably and reliably dead

As Coroner , I thoroughly examined her  
And she's not only merely dead  
She's really most sincerely dead

Then this is a day of independence for all the munchkins  
And their descendants  
Yes, let the joyous news be spread  
The wicked old witch at last is dead

Ding-dong the witch is dead  
Which old witch? The wicked witch  
Ding-dong the wicked witch is dead  
Wake up you sleepyhead  
Rub your eyes, get out of bed  
Wake up the wicked witch is dead  
She's gone where the goblins go  
Below - below - below  
Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out  
Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low  
Let them know the Wicked Witch is dead

We represent the Lullaby League  
The Lullaby League, the Lullaby League  
And in the name of the Lullaby League  
We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land

We represent the Lollipop Guild  
The Lollipop Guild, the Lollipop Guild  
And in the name of the Lollipop Guild  
We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land

We welcome you to Munchkin Land  
Tra la la la la la la la la la la la

From now on you'll be history

You'll be his...

You'll be his...

You'll be history

And we will glorify your name  
You will be a bust...

Be a bust...

Be a bust...

In the hall of fame  
Tra la la la la la la la la la la  
Tra la la la la la la  
Tra la la la la la la la la la la  
Tra la la la la la la

Kris: Bahahahahahahahahaha! Ichigo and Ishida sandwich!!

Ichigo and Ishida: **glare **

Wonderweiss: Tra la la la la la la la la ...

Orihime: Pft… Ahahahahaha! I'm sorry, that's just too funny!!! XD

Ichigo: **…pushes Ishida off him… **just wait til it's your turn

Orihime: O.o

Razz: Don't worry too much, we've only got one more intro dare to go, Jaki, what do you have for them to do?

Jaki: Huh?

Ichigo: Wha?! Where do these people keep coming from??

Razz: What do you mean, we're in a library, at my school, and these people are my friends… Did you really not notice?

Ichigo: **…looks around sneakily…** Ah! Who are all these people?!

Librarian: **frowns**

Ichigo: **falls silent**

Razz: idiot…anyway, Jaki! What's your dare?

Jaki: My dare is… my dare is… I dare… Ichigo to die…

Ichigo: WHAT!!!!

Jaki: No, dye his hair…

Ichigo: … oh

Jaki: dye his hair hot pink on one side and blue on the other! And to run around the school wearing butterfly wings with a cherry blossom kimono on and dance the chicken dance!

Ichigo: … how am I supposed to remember all that?!

Razz: Don't worry, we'll make sure you do every last thing! **…evil laugh…**

So Ichigo is dragged away to get his hair dyed. He shortly returns with hair exactly as specified.

Orihime: … lol XD

Ichigo: shut up, you're all picking on me! ='(

Razz: Stop whining, you're not done yet

Ichigo is then shoved into a cherry blossom kimono and tied down while Kris superglues his butterfly wings to his back. Then he is sent out into the school grounds and commanded by megaphone.

Razz: Hurry up, run dammit!

Ichigo: Shut up!!!

Razz: No!

Kris **…Steals megaphone… **Chicken dance! Do the chicken dance!

Orihime: **…steals megaphone off Kris… **Yeah!! Chicken dance!

Ichigo: **…does chicken dance…**

Jaki: Encore!

Ichigo: Do I have to?

Razz: Yes.

Ichigo: **…does it again, this time with many more spectators…**

Spectators: Bahahahahahahaha!!!

Ichigo: **…runs away…**

Rukia: **…drags Ichigo back… **be a man!

Ichigo: You guys are so mean **…whimpers…**

Razz: Well, that concludes this chapter; feel free to leave a review with your dares and questions!!

Ichigo: No! Don't; unless you're gonna do something to Ishida!

Razz: That's not very nice Ichigo…

Kris: See ya next time!!!!

Jaki: Bye bye

Ichigo: **…groans…**


	2. Of Bees and Heels and Hyper

AN: I still don't own Bleach (bugger, and i actually thought that might change) ^^ Well, second chapter, thanx to everyone who reviewed! This chapter was very fun to write XD Enjoy =]

* * *

Razz: **...grins…**

Ichigo: Oh no, not you again…

Razz: Ah ha! Yes it is I!

Orihime: Yay! ^.^

Razz: Okay, let's get straight into it! Orihime, you seem excited, how about you read out the first dare!

Orihime: Okay =D This one is from charliechick, she says:

_lol lol lol...  
Now I dare Renji to dress in a cute little bumble bee costume and buzz around hugging people at random for the entire chapter (unless he's told to do something else as well) and giving them pamphlets for the honey festival._

Renji: Say what!?

Razz: no arguing!

Kris: yeah! No arguing!

Renji: … Well, do you have a bumblebee costume?

Razz: **…thinks hard…** Ah, no… Ishida! Make us a bumblebee costume!!

Ishida: ...Why?

Razz: To humiliate Renji!

Orihime: Come on Ishida! I know you can do it!

Ishida: fine. **…goes crazy with needle and thread to make costume…**

Renji: **…looks at costume… **hell no!

Razz: ha-ha

Ishida holds up his handiwork proudly. The costume is excellent and complete with piggie tails and a dress.

Orihime: Aww, that's so cute! XD

Renji: No. I will not wear that…

Razz: Yes you will.

Renji: Why, you can't make me

Razz: Can't I?

Renji: NO!

Razz: … **…stares…**

Renji: **…ignores…still ignoring…**

Razz: …

Renji: … Ah fine -.-

Razz: Ah ha!

Before he can change his mind Renji is forcefully dressed in the bumblebee costume. He is given pamphlets for a honey festival and sent on his mission.

Renji (to Ishida): bzz…bzzz **…hugs… **Come to the honey festival!

Ishida: **…looks worried…**

Razz: Well, while he's out, Orihime, the next dare please!

Orihime: Alright! So this one's from charliechick too!

_Ishida- Since you bear such a resemblance to Kyoya from OHSHC, you are going to suffer the same fate as him. I am going to give you the same dare Razz gave him in her first dare for my T/D fic. So get out a pair of stripper heels and strut your stuff! Congratulations, you are the official 'clacky-Tran' of Bleach!_

Ishida: … No.

Kris: Yeah, come on!

Ishida: No, you'll ruin my Quincy pride!

Razz: There is no pride here and no dignity, only the reviewer's word as law… now here! **…stripper heels appear… **put them on and strut!  
Ishida: **…pulls on heels…stands up…falls…stands again…struts and falls…**

Finally Ishida gets the hang of the heels, (surprisingly fast actually) and struts around the school. His return is signalled by a characteristic 'clack clack clack clack', as he makes his entrance he discovers… Keigo and Mizuiro!

Keigo/Mizuiro: O.o Hey, since when has Ishida been gay?

Ishida: What!?

Razz: Hey, you got the hang of that really quickly… have you done this before?

Ishida: Wha?... No, not at all… don't be ridiculous!

Keigo: I shall call you… Sir Clacky!!

Ishida: Hey! No, you can't do that!

Razz: Shut up Ishida and get strutting!

Ishida: I already have!

Razz: We don't need you at the moment, so keep going!

Ishida: **…struts out in a huff…**

In the distance Renji is seen hugging Gin. Gin is disturbed and flees the scene and Renji moves on to his next victim!

Razz: Well, I believe that's all from charliechick, now who wants to read the next dare?

Orihime: Me, me!!!

Razz: You've already had a turn

Nell: I will!

Razz: Sure! **…hands Nell paper...**

Nell: This dare is from… BANGx3! She says:

_I dare Rukia to tell us a story of Eragon and Harry Potter with Rukia's drawing!  
I want to see it!ONE!  
I will dare another one later!  
Thanx :-P_

Ishida: **…from somewhere in the distance… **Not fair! How come she gets an easy dare?

Rukia: Hah! … Wait, who are those people?

Razz: **…grabs computer and shows internet results…**

Rukia: Okay!

Rukia grabs a pencil and paper and begins to draw! After a few minutes she reveals her handiwork. The plot line is unclear, but Harry Potter is supposedly a squishy blob with glasses and Eragon looks very much like a gingerbread-man with rabbit ears.

Rukia: Hah!

Razz: Yes… That's wonderful Rukia…

Rukia: Don't sound so sarcastic!

Razz: Anyway… Rukia how about you-

Rukia: **…gets hugged by Renji and given a pamphlet... Renji flies away… Rukia looks at empty space in horror…**

Razz: …Never mind… Ah, Keigo!

Keigo: Yes?

Razz: Wanna read a dare?

Keigo: YES! Okay, this dare comes from byakuyaxrukiakuchikkifan, she says:

_I dare Renji to kiss Rukia when Byakuya see it!_

Rukia: Huh?

Renji: Bzz…bzzz!? I mean; Wha!?

Byakuya wanders in looking slightly disturbed, probably because of Ishida's natural strutting. Renji swiftly kisses Rukia and hides behind Ichigo.

Ichigo: Get away from me you freak!

Byakuya: **...looks from Renji to Rukia and back again… **I knew it…

Rukia: What?! knew what?!

Renji: **…hugs Byakuya… **Bzzz…bzzz… come to the honey festival **…hands pamphlet… runs…**

Byakuya: What is going on here?

Razz: Nothing at the moment, but while you're here, how about you read the next dare, I'm sure you'll be amused…

Byakuya: I am never amused.

Razz: Yeah, I noticed…

Byakuya: _And I dare Ichigo to dress like a girl and run around soul society and scream "I like Renji!" XD_

Ichigo: Why me?

Byakuya: This will be … interesting….

Ishida: Can I make his costume?

Razz: **…grins evilly… **Yep, go for it, Sir Clacky!

Ishida: **…stabs with a needle… creates masterpiece… shoves on Ichigo…**

Kris: Such a shame it had to be wasted on him…

Ishida: I can make another one if you want one!

Kris: On second thoughts, no thanks, I'm right…

Razz: Alright Ichigo, off you go **… shoves outside…**

Ichigo: Wha?! Where am I supposed to go… what do I have to do?

Razz: … . You weren't listening at all were you…

Ichigo: **…shakes head…**

Razz: Fine, go to soul society, call me when you get there… and DON'T take that dress off!

Moments later…

Ichigo (on phone): Yea, now what?

Razz: Run around screaming "I like Renji."

Ichigo: you're kidding, right?

Razz: No.

Ichigo: fine…

Ichigo puts the phone down and starts running around. Whenever he sees someone he yells that he like's Renji and runs away again.

Renji: Bzz… Bzzz …huh?

Everyone else: hahaha, lol

Razz: Alright, next dare, Byakuya, you read this one!

Byakuya: I read the last one…

Razz: Oh yeah… Read this one anyway!

Byakuya: Whatever… This is from Begoshi… she says:

_Hello!  
I dare Gin be stuck in a room with Yachiru high on several (Three from every member of the cast) bags of lollies, as many fizzy/energy drinks as her bladder can fit and a ton of coffee.  
Look forward to the next chapter :D_

Razz: Sounds fun! Yachiru, come here!

Yachiru: Yep?

Razz: You see that room there? **…points to random empty room…**

Yachiru: Yep!

Razz: If you go in there, then everyone will bring candy and fizzy drinks!

Yachiru: Really!!?

Razz: Yep

Yachiru: **…runs into room… **Bring me my sweets!

The cast slowly come from all corners of the globe bearing sweets, Renji still decked out in bumblebee, Ichigo still cross-dressing and Ishida strutting confidently amongst snickers from his peers. Soon Yachiru is in a heaven of sweets coffee and soft drink. It doesn't take long before she starts to go hyper!

Razz: Gin…

Gin: Yea?

Razz: Go into that room.

Gin: But Yachiru's in there…

Razz: Exactly.

Gin: **…reluctantly walks into room…**

Kenpachi: **…steps in quickly, slams and locks the door…**

Gin: Huh!? What? Let me out!

Razz: Hey Kenpachi, when did you get here? And why did you shut the door?

Ichigo: Because that was the dare?

Razz: Yeah, I know, but why Kenpachi?

Kenpachi: I thought it might be funny…

Razz: Oh, okay

Gin (from behind locked doors): Help me! Somebody please!!! I don't deserve th-

Yachiru: Come play!!! Do you want a sweet?! Come over here Mr. Creepy Guy!!!

Razz: Well…

Everyone else: …

Razz: That's all the dares we have at the moment! So join us next time! Please feel free to review and leave your dare! The wilder the better! ;P

…

Gin: HEEEELLLLLPPPPPP MMMMMEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!


	3. Engaged in a catattack

AN: and... we're back! Thanx for everyone who left reviews, much appreciated! Hope you enjoy this next chapter! :D

* * *

Ichigo:** …looks around…groans… **Man, again?

Razz: Hell yeah! If there are more reviews, there will be more!

Orihime: Yay!

Ichigo: Why are you so happy… this is a horrible, torturous idea!

Orihime: I don't think so… I think its fun! ^-^

Ishida: That's probably because nothing's happened to you yet…

Orihime: **…Shrugs…**

Razz: Alright! Let's get into it, we have some really good dares lined up, so… how about you read this dare Ichigo!

Ichigo: Alright, nothing had better happen to me though…

Razz: Stop complaining

Ichigo: okay, this is from Begoshi;-

Gin: **…runs away…**

Ichigo: she says;

_Heres another._

_I dare Komamura's bankai to use Nnoitra (with is headdress thing) as a spoon to eat fruit loops._

_Make sure it's extra slobbery :P_

Orihime: teehee

Ichigo: ??

Orihime: Huh?

Komamura: Someone said my name

Ichigo: **…shows paper…**

Komamura: Bring me the man with the unpronounceable name…

Orihime: O.o He reminds me of doom

Everyone: …?

Razz: Anyways, can someone fetch Nnoitra please

Ichigo: You do it, you're in charge

Razz: Whatever

Nnoitra: **…appears…**

Razz: Ah, the benefits of being the author… =]

Komamura: **…goes bankai on Nnoitra's ass…**

Nnoitra: hey! What's going on here!? I di_…blub…glub…bleh…_**…gets dunked into giant bowl of fruit loops…**

Komamura's bankai: Mmmm… fruit loops…. **…noms on Nnoitra's head-plus-fruit-loops…**

Nnoitra: aaaaahhhhh…. AAAHHHHH…… HELP ME! I DON'T WANNA GET ET! …. blubblubblehgllubgllublug….AHHHHHHahhhhhhhhh

Razz: Well, while Mr. Bankai gets on with that, let's have the next dare!

Komamura Bankai: **…slobber drips onto the ground as Nnoitra again descends to the bowl, screaming bloody murder…**

Razz: Gross… Yachiru, do you think you've calmed down enough to read the next dare?

Yachiru: Yep! Okay!! It says… oh wait, yeh… It's from Shinseii! She says:

_WOO love it so far!_

_Well I dare Byakuya to pole dance as a tranny, in front of Yamamoto with choreography is done by Matsumoto and Yachiru to Barbie Girl_

_~Shinseii_

Byakuya: What?

Yachiru/Matsumoto: YAY!!!! WE GET TO CHOREOGRAPH A POLE DANCE!!

Matsumoto: It's always been a life long dream :D

Yachiru: What's a pole dance?

Matsumoto: **…explains…**

Yachiru: Oh… We won't tell Yamamoto til it's done

Matsumoto: Good idea

Byakuya: **…tries to sneak away…**

Matsumoto: Oh no you don't!

Byakuya: Do I have no say in this?

Razz: Yep, pretty much! :D

Byakuya: …

With Yachiru and Matsumoto's enthusiasm it is not long before Byakuya is decked out in a very convincing tranny getup.

Matsumoto: You could get rich if you did professional favours you know

Byakuya: I never agreed to this…

It takes a few hours, but finally, Byakuya is ready for his pole dancing debut! Yamamoto is summoned and given front row seats. Byakuya is concealed within a curtain… Then the music begins…

Hi Barbie

Hi Ken!

Do you wanna go for a ride?

Sure Ken!

Jump In...

Curtains open to reveal a trannyfied Byakuya!

Yamamoto: Is that?... Never mind, I don't want to know…

Byakuya: **…pole dances…and sings…**

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a blond bimbo girl, in the fantasy world

Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly

You're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamour in pink,

Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky...

You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"

(Uu-oooh-u)

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please

I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees

Come jump in, bimbo friend, let us do it again,

Hit the town, fool around, let's go party

You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"

You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours"

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Ah-ah-ah-yeah)

Come on Barbie, let's go party!

(Uu-oooh-u)

Oh, I'm having so much fun!

Well Barbie, we're just getting started

Oh, I love you Ken!

Everyone: **..scarred…**

Razz: Well, now… then…

Orihime: O.O

Ichigo: Hey, Orihime, are you alright?

Orihime: O.o

Byakuya: **…retreats in shame…**

Razz: Okay, our next dare is from… BANGx3! She says:

_hahaha!_

_it's always fun to read rachi-kun's stories!_

_this time, I dare ishida to make most ridiculous cloth he can make. Now, give time to make one..._

_then give to Orihime to wear it and be really serious and teach Australian history from European came to Australia!_

_I'm not sure whether it's going to be fun, but... Thanx Rachi-Kun!_

Ishida: Yes! Something not completely humiliating!

Razz: Don't get used to it

Ishida: **…goes into epic making mode… comes back with huge, puffy dress with sleeves that almost look like giant croissants and so many frills it had to weigh at least a ton…**

Orihime: Wow… that's… unique…

Ishida: Yes, now wear it!

Orihime: You're kidding.

Razz: Nope! And you have to teach Australian History!

Orihime: … fine… **…puts on dress… goes to classroom and starts talking…**

Everyone slowly starts to fall asleep and is woken a few hours later by Orihime's snoring.

Ichigo: Wha?!… what was?… oh, it's Orihime…

Orihime: an' that's…. why… you…..hippos…. 'hic'… mamma…

Razz: lets leave her and have the next dare please!

Ichigo: Alright, I'll read it. It's from Mio-tan and she says: huh?

Razz: What?

Ichigo: No way. Uh-uh, if I don't read it I don't have to do it!

Razz: … Hey Matsumoto!  
Matsumoto: Yeah?

Razz: Read this.

Matsumoto: Sure, Mio-tan says:

_I would like to dare Byakuya do a threesome with Renji and Ichigo while Yoruichi takes photos of them_

_*smiles evilly* _

Ichigo: Damn

Renji: Damn

Byakuya: **…sighs… **Have I not been humiliated enough?

Razz: Obviously not

Yoruichi: Yes! I will enjoy this very much!

Ichigo: Pervert.

Yoruichi: No, not like that! I meant the humiliating bit, I-

Byakuya: **…shudders…**

Renji, Ichigo, Byakuya and Yoruichi then disappear into a darkened room. Soon the threesome commences and flashes of light from the camera are seen. It is a few hours before they resurface. Ichigo and Renji look decidedly dishevelled while Byakuya looks pristine. Yoruichi follows them looking horrified. They all disappear to their respective homes.

Razz: Hey, when did I say you could leave?!

Orihime: I'm sure they'll be back!

Razz: Yeah, Orihime, would you do the honours?

Orihime: Sure! The next dare is from charliechick! She has this to say!

_Bahahahahahaha!_

_Nicely done everyone xD. I fell a bit sorry for Gin though, but jealous of Yachiru. That would have been fun I bet! xD_

_On to the dares...I dare Ulquiorra and Byakuya to dress up in chicken suits and chase Chad through the city, trying to get him into a chicken suit too(sorry Chad)_

Razz: …Even though it's highly amusing, I'm beginning to pity Byakuya, just for this chapter…

Ishida: Ha-ha

Razz: Shut up Sir Clacky

Ishida: **…glares…**

Razz: Well, alright. Byakuya, Ulquiorra, come here!

Byakuya: **…groans…**

Ulquiorra: **…looks around… **What is this place?

Razz: **…gives out chicken suits…**

Byakuya: What's this third one for?

Ulquiorra: Why have you given me this?

Razz: Put it on

Ulquiorra: I won't

Razz: I'll make you then

Ulquiorra: You're trash, you can't make me

Razz: I'm the author, I can!

Ulquiorra: **…puts costume on…**

Byakuya: **…puts on costume also…**

Chad: **…appears…**

Razz: Well, off you go then!

Team Emo soon takes off after Chad carrying the extra chicken suit. They disappear up a street and soon nothing can be heard.

Razz: Well, we'll find out what happened later, now let's read the next dare! This one's also from charliechick and it says:

_And I dare Keigo to propose to Ichigo while wearing a sailor moon outfit. _

Keigo: **…appears…** What, I don't want to do that!

Ishida: Too bad

Keigo: **…sulks…puts on sailor moon outfit…**

Ichigo: Um… Keigo, are you alright?

Keigo: **…gets down on one knee…**

Ichigo: Hey, you know that skirt isn't the best thing to be kneeling down in….

Keigo: Ichigo!

Ichigo: Yeah?

Keigo: Ichigo, will you…. Will you…

Ichigo: **…looks suspicious… **Will I what?

Keigo: …willyoumarryme?

Ichigo: What?

Keigo: Well? Answer the question!

Ichigo: What did you say?

Keigo: I asked you to marry me! Look! **…waves ring in the air…**

Ichigo: Oh… um…

Keigo: Ah forget it…

Ichigo: Wait, yeah

Keigo: huh? Really?

Ichigo: What? You asked me, what did you want me to say?

Keigo: **…gives ring…**

Everybody else: …O.o…

Razz: Well… _coughcough_…I was not expecting that…

Orihime: What's the next dare?

Razz: Yes! The next dare is from QuincyArcherIsABadAss! Orihime, would you like to read it?

Orihime: Sure, it says:

_Ehehehehe...I Dare Ishida to wear a bikini and stay with it on in the school and in soul society then I want him to say "I love you to Genryusai Yamamoto!_

Ishida: …I don't suppose I'm going to get out of this, am I?

Razz: Not at all!

Ishida: …fine…

Ishida puts on the bikini and wanders around the school in it for a bit. Then he makes his way to soul society, seeing the final capture of Chad by Team Emo and his resulting encasing in a chicken suit.

Orihime: Bahahahahahaha! Sucks to be any of you! xD

Ishida then enters soul society and earns many stares from the residents. He then chances upon Yamamoto. He knows that this is his chance!

Yamamoto: …hello, you were one of the ryoka, weren't you?

Ishida: I LOVE YOU GENRYUSAI YAMAMOTO! .

Yamamoto: …

Ishida: **…runs…**

Razz: ahahahhaha! Poor Yamamoto, he has no idea why these things keep happening!

Rukia: The next dare is from gray-eyed!

Razz: Hey, who said you could do that?

Rukia: I thought it was time.

Razz: Whatever…

Rukia: ahem… gray-eyed says:

_I dare Orihime to call Ulquiorra Emo-chan constantly and then run around giving him sweets and forcing him to smile in an effort to cheer him up._

Orihime: ! Yay! **…grabs sweets bag of sweets…**

Ulquiorra: **…frees himself of chicken costume and is unaware of what is about to happen…**

Orihime: **…glomps…**EMO-CHAN!!! xD

Ulquiorra: Wha? Get off me woman!

Orihime: Oh, don't be sad, Emo-chan! Here, have a sweet!

Ulquiorra: I don't want a sweet, sweets are for trash!

Orihime: Smile Emo-chan! Have a sweet!

Ulquiorra: **…runs…**

Orihime: **…chases…**

Rukia: well, while they do that, lets get on with the next dare!

Razz: Hey! Quit stealing my job!

Rukia: **...ignores… **This next dare is also from gray-eyed:

_I also dare Szayel to perform a rendition of "I'm Super" from South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut in front of the residents of Hueco Mundo (Luppi and Cuuhlhourne can be backup singers)._

Szayel: Oh-KAY!

Luppi/Cuuhlhourne: Woot!

The stage for the performance is quickly set up and invitations sent out to all Hueco Mundo residents. A few hours ready, all is ready… and the show begins!

…

Later…  
Ichigo: arghh!… my eyes! They burn!!!

Razz: Why were you there? You're not a H.M resident

Ichigo: what? Damn, Ulquiorra told me I had to go

Razz: Okay… anyway, the dares a coming to an end now, only a few left! This next one is from Okibimaru! Who wants to read it?

Yachiru/Orihime/Matsumoto/Byakuya: Oo!! Me, me, pick me!

Razz: Byakuya?

Byakuya: I'm bored.

Razz: Okay, Byakuya, go ahead!

Byakuya: The dare goes as follows:

_Here is one, I dare Ichigo to have a fight against all the captains of soul society at the same time_

Kenpachi: Hah, Yes!

Byakuya: Yes, something I might actually enjoy…

Yamamoto: Hello

Soi-Fon: This will be too easy

Unohana: I'm afraid I'm not very good at fighting…

Komamura: Do we need bankai? I'm afraid mine's still eating…

Kyoraku: Hmmm…do I have to?

Hitsugaya: Why, what is the point?

Mayuri: Can I experiment when we're done?  
Ukitake: …

Aizen/Ichimaru/Tosen: Do we count?

Razz: Sure, why not!

Ichigo: Hey! No fair thirteen against one!

Razz: Shut up and fight!

Ichigo: Alright… BRING IT!!!1!!

The captains immediately jump on Ichigo, sort of like what they do in football. There is much yelling and bankai-ing and all round general beating up. After a few minutes two things become clear:

1. That Ichigo is probably dead by now, and

2. The captains are enjoying this _way_ too much

Eventually they have had enough and back off to reveal Ichigo, battered and bloody, lying on the floor.

Ichigo: Damn

Unohana: **…takes to hospital…**

Razz: Well now! Let's go to the next dare while we're all still gathered here, how about…. Mayuri! You read it.

Mayuri: It is from xMidnight-Spiritx. It says:

_I dare toshiro to run around the soul society acting crazy and to go up to all the captains and tell them something stupid_

Hitsugaya: …

Razz: Go on then

Hitsugaya: I'd really rather not…

Razz: Who cares what you want?

Hitsugaya: … I hate you…

Razz: Suits me, as long as you do what you're told!  
Hitsugaya: **…starts running…approaches Mayuri…** You smell of cabbages!

Mayuri: **…sniffs… **I do not!

Hitsugaya: **…continues on his haphazard and maniacal way…goes up to Ukitake and Kyoraku… **When I grow up I wanna be a twin!!

Kyoraku: I know it's a dare, but somehow… it's like he had this childish, stupid nature hidden away somewhere inside of him which is only now getting an opportunity to show itself…

Razz: Righty… Well, while he's occupied, we'll read this last dare!

Ichigo (from hospital): Finally… over…. **…sighs in relief…**

Razz: This one's from Kira-3-5-9, who wants to read it!?

Yachiru: I do! It says:

_I dare soi fon to yell I hate cats in front of Yoruichi and watch her reaction. (Be prepared soi fon)_

Soi-Fon: I see no challenge on that…

Razz: Hmm… I wouldn't be too sure bout that…

Soi-Fon: **…goes to Yoruichi… **I HATE CATS!  
Yoruichi: I beg your pardon?

Soi-Fon: I hate cats

Yoruichi: Right, that's it! **…goes spaz and turns into cat-form and catattacks Soi-Fon…**

Soi-Fon: **...is very surprised…. And bloody…. And wonders what catattack was supposed to mean… **

Razz: Well, that seems to be all we have for the time being… feel free to leave more dares!

Ichigo: No, please don't!

Hitsugaya: **…to Soi-Fon… **You have a cat on your head

Soi-Fon: …Thankyou, captain obvious…

Hitsugaya: **…to Komamura… **my name isn't obvious.

Komamura: …

Razz: See you all next time!! xD


	4. Busy busy busy busy

Razz: It's cold… =(

Ichigo: Great, does that mean you won't make us do anything?

Razz: What!? Of course not! You must entertain the lovely people who have been reviewing!

Ichigo: **…goes and sobs quietly in the corner…**

Razz: Oh, you big baby

Orihime: … So are there any good dares?

Razz: Yeah, of course! They're all good dares!

Orihime: **…puppy eyes…**

Razz: …fine, you can read the first dare…

Orihime: Yay! This one's from … dun-dun-dun… charliechick!

_Lols xD  
Urahara- Slow dance with Kenpachi_

Urahara: Bit demanding, isn't she…

Kenpachi: With him?!

Razz: That's what it says

Urahara: I've always been open to new experiences…

Kenpachi: **…shifts feet awkwardly… **_icantdance…._

Urahara: What was that?

Kenpachi: …_icantdance_…

Urahara: Slow down!

Kenpachi: I can't dance! Alright…. I bash stuff up, I'm not designed for… dancing…

Urahara: … Well… I'll teach you then!

Kenpachi: …alright…

Razz: We'll tune unto them again later, when Kenpachi's learnt to dance, for now, we'll go to the next dare, take it away Orihime!

Orihime: Right! It's another one from charliechick, and it says:

_Orihime- "accidentally" stick your tongue to the inside of a freezer. Ulquiorra and Grimmjaw must join forces to help you get it off_

Razz: Sounds cool! Get it? Cool!… ah… never mind…

Orihime: OKAY! **…goes to freezer… licks the inside… **arhgg….iths really col' guyth!

Ulquiorra: I don't see why I have to help her, if she was stupid enough to get stuck there in the first place…

Grimmjaw: Can I cut it off? That would work!

Orihime: **…is suddenly very worried…**

Ulquiorra: Hey, that sounds like a good idea!

Orihime: No ith noht!! No ith noht!!!

Grimmjaw: **…cuts freezer door off…**

Orihime: **…falls… **You I'iot!

Grimmjaw: What?

Razz: … keep trying guys, seeing as Orihime's tongue is… stuck, we'll get Rukia to read the next dare!  
Rukia: from charliechick, again…

_Hirako- Grow your hair long and smexy like it was 100 years ago and let me pigtail plat it_

Ichigo: Hirako had long hair!?

Hirako: …please no…

Kris: Yes! Do it!

Hirako: **…grows hair…**

Ichigo: O.o

Kris: Yay! **…drags Hirako to a seat and starts to plait…**

Hirako: ='[

Grimmjaw(somewhere in the background): Hold still dammit woman! It's almost there!

Orihime: **…screaming…**

Razz: Well, seems they're not quite done yet… Kenpachi, how are you two coming along?

Kenpachi: **…trips over own feet…**

Razz: I see… Next dare then!

Rukia:

_Ichigo:...hm...Lick Renji's foot._

_That's all for now. Hope you had fun ;)_

Ichigo: What? That's gross!

Renji: Yeah! I don't want him touching me!

Razz: Do it!  
Ichigo/Renji: NO!  
Razz: **…glares…**

Ichigo/Renji: **…ignore…**

Razz: **…taps foot… **One………TWO………. THR-

Ichigo: Alright alright!

Renji: chicken.

Ichigo: Just take the shoe off

Renji: **…screws up nose…takes off shoe…**

Ichigo: Eew… do you ever wash your feet?

Renji: Shut up!

Ichigo: **…licks foot…**

Renji: Hey… that tickled…

Ichigo: BLEH!!!... OH, MAN!!! THAT'S GROSS!!!!!. **…runs to sink…washes out mouth…**

Kenpachi: I got it!

Everyone else: … huh?  
Kenpachi: I can dance now ^-^

Razz: … for some reason I find Kenpachi's smile extra creepy today…

Urahara: Okay, we're ready 3

Razz: Cue music!

Random slow dance music starts playing, although there is no CD player in sight. Urahara, presumably acting as the 'female' is hanging from Kenpachi's neck with his feet dangling a metre above the ground. Kenpachi starts shuffling elegantly around the room. They gaze into each others eyes until Kenpachi's bells get on Urahara's nerves and he kicks Kenpachi in the shin.

Kenpachi: **…drops Urahara…** Hey!

Urahara: 3

Ulquiorra: **…appears…** We did it

Grimmjaw: You mean I did it

Ulquiorra: Shut up trash, it was my idea

Grimmjaw: Yeah, so why didn't **you** warm up the ice around her tongue with your hand

Ulquiorra: why would I do something if I could get you do to it for me?

Razz: Stop arguing, Ulquiorra read the next dare

Ulquiorra: It's from IchimaruToushirou, the dare says:

_I dare toshiro 2 wear a waiteress' dress made by ishida and goes up to gin and say "I love you" and kiss him on the lips. Oh, and I want matsumoto and hinamori to be around when they do it._

Ishida: Yes! Another outlet for my talents!!

Hitsugaya: Um… say what?

Ishida: **…makes lovely, smexy waitress dress… graciously gives to Hitsugaya…**

Hitsugaya: I don't want it! I won't do it!

Matsumoto: Do what?

Hinamori: What are you going to do Hitsugaya-kun?

Hitsugaya: Nothing! I'm not going to do anything!

Razz: Aw, come on, don't disappoint the readers!

Hitsugaya: I don't about the readers!

Razz: I do! And so you will do as you're told!!

Hitsugaya: **…reluctantly gets into dress… **I'm gonna kill you for this!

Razz: **…grabs a random off the street… **How about you kill this guy, he's expendable!

Random: Hey!

Hitsugaya: **…goes searching for Gin…is followed by Matsumoto and Hinamori…**

Matsumoto: Where are we going?

Hitsugaya: WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME??

Hinamori: Hitsugaya-kun?

Hitsugaya: What!?

Hinamori: Why are you wearing a dress?

Hitsugaya: …shut up!

The three continue to trek through the streets until they locate Gin! Hitsugaya tries to run away, but is spotted by Gin.

Gin: Why are wearing a dress? ^-^

Hitsugaya: …

Hinamori: Yeah, why? And why won't you tell us why?

Matsumoto: You say why too much…

Hitsugaya: It's because of this… **…kisses Gin… **I… love you…

Gin: Oh… well I guess that's a good enough reason ^-^

Matsumoto: Have you gotten into my sake store?

Hitsugaya: What? No!

Gin: Oh good, so you meant it then! ^-^

Hitsugaya: yea, I mean NO! No, it was a d­- mnmnmnmngnmgnhmngnhgm

Razz: You're not allowed to tell! =P

Hinamori: You really meant it Hitsugaya-kun!?

Hitsugaya: **…runs away to avoid more embarrassment…**

Razz: Well… looks like it's about time for the next dare~!

Gin: Dare… can I read it? ^-^

Razz: Sure!

Gin: It's from Mikazuki Mitsukai ^-^ She says:

_I want Ichigo in Soi Fon's outfit to kiss Rukia on the beach. It's nice to read your fics, BTW._

Razz: Well thanks! And now… Soi-Fon!

Soi-Fon: What?

Razz: Do you have a spare one of those costumes that you wear?

Soi-Fon: Of course! Do you really think I'd wear the same outfit everyday!

Razz: Well… you sorta do….

Soi-Fon: But it's not exactly the same one! I wash them in between wear!

Razz: Alright! I believe you, can we borrow one?

Soi-Fon: Yeah **…gives outfit… **Why do you want it?

Razz: I don't think you want to know… **…hands to Ichigo…**

Soi-Fon: I'm washing that twice now… no three times… **…shudders…**

Ichigo: **…looks at outfit… **No way, this won't fit!

Razz: What do you mean?

Ichigo: Well… to start with I'm taller then her…

Razz: Stop complaining! Put it on!

Ichigo: **…puts it on…**

Razz: Now… Go to the beach!

Ichigo: Eh? But it's raining!

Razz: Too bad, be gone!

Ichigo: **…sullenly goes to beach in the pouring rain… is followed sneakily by a floating camera…**

Razz: Hey Rukia!

Rukia: What?

Razz: Go to the beach!

Ichigo (From beach): I have to dress up, go to the beach in the pouring rain, and kiss a technically dead chick!?

Rukia: What did he say?

Razz: Doesn't matter, go to the beach!

Rukia: Fine!

Rukia turns up at the beach and spots a vaguely Ichigo shaped thing down on the beach. As she gets closer the shape becomes more distinct… As well as what it's wearing…

Rukia: Ichigo?

Ichigo: Yeah…

Rukia: Please tell me that is not Soi-Fon's outfit…

Ichigo: Well… that would be lying…

Rukia: What the hell?

Ichigo: …

Rukia: why would you do that?!

Ichigo: **…kisses Rukia…**

Rukia: …?

Ichigo: …

Rukia: …

Ichigo: …

Rukia: **…gets up and leaves…**

Ichigo: **…runs away …**

Everyone else: … … … …

Razz: Okay! Next dare! This one's from Mio-tan!

_My new dare now:_

_I dare Ichimaru to stop grinning for the whole chapter_

Gin: Awww…. fine

Kris (whilst plaiting): hey! He looks even creepier when he's not smiling!

Razz: yea… okay, Mio-tan has another dare, Szayel! You read this one!

Szayel: From Mio-tan:

_And last for Unohana to be showing her evil side for the whole chapter._

Gin: Unohana has an evil side?

Unohana: **…grins… unleashes bankai on innocent bystander… **Hah! Take that!

Gin: Ahhhh!

Ichigo: **…comes in drenched… gets whacked by Unohana…. **My day cannot get any worse…

Razz: Yes, I'm sure it can!! Ichigo read the next dare!

Ichigo: Okay… it's from Okibimaru, it says:

_my next dare is for Yachiru, I dare her to spend two weeks following Hitsugaya and making height related jokes whenever he is in the presence of a captain or female (make them extra funny when near Hinamori and Matsumoto)_

Yachiru: OH-Kay!

Hitsugaya: **…looks behind him… **What are you doing?

Yachiru: Nothing; hows the weather down there?

Hitsugaya: You are not in the position to be making height related jokes! You are shorter then I am!

Yachiru: Yeah, but I'm younger too…

Yachiru then proceeds to follow Hitsugaya everywhere he goes, literally _everywhere_. Hitsugaya becomes very annoyed, especially when she begins to make very loud, rude comments about his height whenever somebody goes past.

Yachiru: hey, short-stuff, where are we going?

Matsumoto: **…snickers…**

Hitsugaya: WILL YOU SHUT UP!!!  
Hinamori: Who me?

Hitsugaya: No, stupid midget girl!

Yachiru: Look who's calling the pot black, dwarf-man

Hitsugaya: I'LL KILLYOU!!!!!!!  
Kenpachi: No you won't, you're just sore that you're short…

Hitsugaya: **…runs away and cries…**

Razz: hahaha!

Orihime: Next dare!

Razz: Yes!

Orihime: Okay! It's from… '~! The dare says:

_I dare Aizen to get the soutaicho to marry him while they're both wearing a hot pink tutu..._

Aizen: Maybe I don't want to…

Razz: Too bad, I spent minutes of my valuable time trying to work out what a soutaicho was, so you will do it! End of story!

Kris (from behind Hirako): I thought it was Hinamori!

Yamamoto: I am nothing like that child.

Razz: I sorta noticed…

Kris: Yeah, you're sorta a lot older then her…

Yamamoto: I may be old!

Aizen: Yes, you are old, and now you have to marry me!

Yamamoto: !...

Kris: Don't forget the pink tutus!

Aizen: Hey you Kris girl… why are you still plaiting Hirako's hair?

Kris: Shut up, it's **really **long! And don't change the subject!

Moments later… Aizen and Yamamoto are walking down the aisle in lovely pink tutus. Aizen's is actually rather flattering on him (we all know he had a secret~!) but Yamamoto was just…. disturbing.

Yamamoto: How did this get organised so quickly?

Razz: We had it pre-booked

Hanatarou: Um… do you… Aizen… take this man … Yamamoto!?......

Aizen: Hurry up!

Hanatarou: to be your lawfully wedded husband?

Aizen: yes

Razz: No, you do.

Aizen: …I do…

Hanatarou: and, um, do you Yamamoto take this man, Aizen… to be your lawfully wedded………wife?

Yamamoto: I suppose I have to…

Razz: Oh come on guys! How hard is it to say two words?!

Yamamoto: Alright, I do.

Aizen: Hey! I'm a man! Not a woman! I should be the husband.

Hanatarou: youmaykissthebride! **…runs far away…**

Razz: Well… while those to go on a honeymoon, or something, let's have the next dare! How about… Hitsugaya! You read it!

Hitsugaya: **…glares daggers… **

Razz: What? What'd I do?

Hitsugaya: It's gonna be something awful for me, isn't it…

Razz: No, no! Don't worry

Hitsugaya: Fine, whatever… It's from ichilover3 and it goes as follows:

_I dare Ichigo to grab Rukia's butt for the entire chapter and not let go no matter how much she beats him._

Ichigo: What!? I don't even like her! Why do I have to keep doing these things?!

Unohana: **…smashes Ichigo with bankai…**

Ichigo: …

Rukia: What's going on- HEY!!!!

Ichigo: Hello~!

Rukia: What the hell you think you're doing!

Ichigo: Um… grabbing your butt?

Rukia: **…starts bashing him… **Let go you creep!

Ichigo: **…doesn't let go…**

Razz: **…snickers…**

Ichigo: Shut up you

Razz: alright, Hitsugaya, you may continue!

Hitsugaya: There's more- oh, yeah ichilover3 also dares;

_I also dare Hitsugaya to profess his love to Karin IN FRONT of Ichigo, who is still grabbing Rukia's behind._

Razz: Someone fetch Karin

Keigo: Sir Clacky!

Ishida: Are you sure you want to say that…

Keigo: I'll get her! **…runs…**

Karin: Huh? Where's this?

Hitsugaya: You do not want to know…nor do you want to stay here long

Karin: What's with you kid?

Hitsugaya: **…fumes… **I am NOT a KID!!!  
Karin: Yeah sure, whatever…

Razz: **…nudges Hitsugaya…**

Hitsugaya: Hey Karin?

Ichigo: **…watches suspiciously…gets pounded in head by Rukia…**

Karin: What do you want?

Hitsugaya: I…I love you Karin!

Karin/Gin: Huh!?

Karin: hey, who are you?

Gin: Hitsugaya you cheater! I thought you loved me!

Hitsugaya: **…goes pale…**

Ichigo: Damn… I don't have enough hands to strangle you with…

Hitsugaya: **…backs away slowly… **Um… later **…runs…**

Razz: Well, he seems to be doing a lot of running lately…

Rukia: Somebody get him off!!!!

Razz: Next dare~!

Orihime: It's from…x-x SilverRain x-x she dares:

_HAHAHAHA! I love this story! Okay, I dare Byakuya to go around the whole Soul Society and act like Ranka Fujioka from Ouran! He'll act the way Ranka does in front of these people playing these people:_

_Ichigo: Tamaki_

_Rukia: Haruhi_

_Ukitake and Kyoraku: The Twins_

_Uryu: Kyoya_

_Kenpachi: Mori_

_Hitsugaya: Hunny._

_Fufufufufu... I await your next chapter to see how this turns out..._

Razz: Ah…. This will be interesting…

Byakuya: Who is this _Ranka?_

Razz: **…explains…**

Byakuya: Oh… Goody…

Razz: Aww, don't sound so excited

Ichigo: Who's Tamaki?

Razz: Tamaki… is an idiot like you, but a lot more dramatic

Rukia: I think you had better explain all these people to all of us…

Kris: Ooh! Let me!!!

Razz: go for it

Kris: Haruhi is clumsy and a pretend boy and the twins are gay and…. **…rambles….**

People: Ahhhh…..

Hitsugaya: I am NOT SHORT!!! … nor do I like cake

Kenpachi: **…picks up Hitsugaya and puts on shoulders… **

Hitsugaya: You do this a lot, don't you? **…gets hit in head by Unohana's passing wrath…**

Ishida: **…pushes glasses up nose… **This should be easy

Byakuya: AHH~!!! HARUHI~!!!!  
Rukia: What do you want?

Ukitake/Kyoraku: Haruhi~!

Rukia: Yes?

Ichigo: AH! You horrible twins! Stay away from her, your polluting her mind!!

Byakuya: You!!!! **…points at Ichigo… **Stay away from my daughter!!!

Ichigo: No!!! You cannot separate me from my daughter~!

Byakuya: She's not your daughter! **…continue to fight…**

Razz: Well then… let's continue, Kyo- I mean, Ishida, you read the next dare.

Ishida: hmmm… it is from Master Bleach and says:

_I dare Orihime to give the arrancar some of her cookies._

_I dare them it it eat._

Orihime: Yay~! **…goes and busies herself with cooking…**

Razz: Okay, arrancar, gather round

Ulquiorra: I don't see the point of this…

Orihime: Cookies for everyone! ^-^

Grimmjow: yeah, whatever… urhgh, what is that? That is foul!!

Szayel: **…coughs and splutters…**

Orihime: My own original recipe; asparagus, leek and marshmallow cookies!

Ichigo: **...shudders…**

Razz: Well… they ate it… Szayel, wanna read the next dare?

Szayel: **…is too busy coughing and spluttering to reply…**

Razz: Okay, guess not, well, it's from Master Bleach again, and it says:

_I dare everyone to attack Aizen._

Ichigo: Alright!!

Hitsugaya: Finally, a dare I can enjoy!

Aizen: Everyone, as in just those from soul society, correct?

Razz: **…smiles sweetly… **No, everyone as in _everyone_.

Grimmjow: haha! I'm gonna enjoy this!

Aizen: oh dear…

Jaki: Me too?

Razz: Sure! Why not! xD

…**everyone attacks Aizen… when the dust clears all that is left is a smoking pile of rubble…**

Kris: Ah… Where did Aizen go?

Grimmjow: I don't know, good riddance I say!

Jaki: I think he's under the table!

Everyone else: **…looks…**

Aizen: **…sneaks out window…**

Razz: Well… Oh-kay! Let's move on to the next dare! It's from Begoshi!!

Orihime: Yay!

Razz: Um, yes… well! She says:

_Fantastic! It makes em laugh. I have yet another dare, and this one involves Kiara (Yes, I'm bringing your dog into this)  
I dare you to let Kiara (in house eating mode) loose in Aizen's diabolical secret hideout :D_

Ichigo: What? Who's Kiara?

Razz: She's my dog. She's very stupid. She once chewed a hole through the wall of my house…

Ichigo: Hah! Finally something bad happens to you!!

Razz: Uh-huh, anyways… Kiara! Go free! **…let's loose Kiara in Hueco Mundo…**

Kiara quickly invades Las Noches through a wall and begins to cause havoc and eats through so many walls that the whole castle collapses.

Soul Society: Hahaha!! Take that betches!

Grimmjow: Hey! I lived there!

Kris: Sucks to be you guys…

Orihime: What's the next dare?

Jaki: I'll read it! It's from xMidnight-Spiritx and it says:

_these dares just keep getting funnier  
I would like 2 dare Rangiku 2 get her captains coat and dye it pink and see what happens at da next captains meeting._

Razz: Haha, alright, of you go Rangiku!

Rangiku: **…grins…finds Hitsugaya's coat…dies a lovely shade of fluoro pink…hangs back on wall…**

Hitsugaya: Huh!? Rangiku! What have you done!?

Rangiku: Me? What makes you think it was me?? I'm offended captain!

Hitsugaya: **…scowls…puts on coat and goes to meeting…**

Kenpachi: Hey, short stuff, what happened to you?

Hitsugaya: I am not short… and I do not want to talk about what happened.

Kenpachi: Hmph… what ever.

Mayuri: Hey, lets gang up on the short kid!

Other captains: Yeah!

Yamamoto: That will not be necessary!

Soi-fon: But he's out of uniform!  
Yamamoto: Fine, go for it.

Hitsugaya: NO! Hey, leave me alone!!!

…**chaos ensues…**

Razz: Well… that went down well… Next dare ^.^ Who wants to read?

Ishida: I wish to read.

Razz: Really? Okay, go for your life, Sir Clacky.

Ishida: **…glares… **This dare is from Mikazuki Mitsukai:

_I want Yamamoto soutaicho declared his undying love to Hitsugaya kun. but while doing that, Yamamoto soutaicho must wearing a pink ballerina outfit, plus high heels, butterfly wings, and chappy bandana, all PINK!_

_P.S; he must do that in front of everyone in Seireitei with drama style, you know, dropped in one knee, bring pink roses, and poetic words!_

_sorry if there are any misspellings! I love this fic_

Yamamoto: I believe we may have already killed Hitsugaya.

Hitsugaya: No, I'm alright, why what's going on?

Yamamoto: **…thinks… **Damn….

Razz and Kris: **…take Yamamoto away to get dressed up…**

Jaki: **…makes sure Hitsugaya doesn't run away…**

Yamamoto: **…returns…**

Hitsugaya: Um… Soutaicho… are you alright?

Yamamoto: **…is embarrassed to find all of soul society watching… **

Renji: Don't you think that's a bit too much pink, soutaicho?

Yamamoto: **…pulls out pink rose… gives to Hitsugaya… drops to one knee…**

Hitsugaya: Um… Soutaicho??? **…backs away slowly…**

Yamamoto: Oh, Hitsugaya! My love for you is like muffins in an oven! It started out small and insignificant and doughy but it has grown and puffed up to be the deliciously scrumptious thing that it is now!!

Hitsugaya: **…runs far, far away…**

Byakuya: What just happened?

Razz: I'm not sure… Lets move on!

Orihime: Yay! Next dare! Who's it from, who's it from!?

Rukia: It's from apola55! She says:

_funny! I love you Byakuya! will you marry me? (get on one knee showing a really big diamond)_

Byakuya: Is that a question?

Razz: I think so… go on answer it!

Byakuya: **…looks at diamond…looks at apola55…takes diamond… **No **…runs away…**

Razz: Hey! That was mean! Give that back to apola55!

Byakuya: **…from distance… **Hahahaha! No.

Razz: Ah… sorry about that, we'll get him back later, meanwhile, next dare! Rukia, would you care to continue

Rukia: This one's also from apola55:

_strawberry! (Ichigo) u gotta admit you gay and them kiss the pineapple (Renji)_ _Renji you have to get married to Ichigo and he cannot divorce you XD_

Ichigo: Oh great… why do I always get stuck in these situations??

Renji: What situations?

Ichigo: Hey Renji, guess what, I'm gay

Renji: really?

Ichigo: yes, apparently…

Renji: Yeah? Well… will you marry me?

Ichigo: Sure why not, it's not like anything worse could happen…

Keigo: Ichigo~! Why are abandoning me!?

Ichigo: **…is kissing Renji…**

Keigo: **…goes and cries…**

Razz: Ichigo, how could you!

Kris: Next dare, next dare!!

Orihime: It's from BANGx3! She says-

Jaki: That's me!!!

Orihime: **…glares… **Shh… I'm reading! **…clears throat… **She says:

_^^ hi!_

_I just want to dare something..._

_I dare Ichigo to not to go to school for whole week and help his dad's work. then every single person in bleach to come and tease Ichigo. and he's not allow to say a word!_

_Maybe it's not that funny..._

Razz: I'm sure it will be fine! Ichigo go to work!!

Ichigo: **…sighs…goes to work with his dad…**

Isshin: YAY~! Ichigo is coming to work~! **…tries to hit Ichigo in the face…**

Ichigo: **…blocks…**

Razz: Well, while Ichigo is at work, lets have another dare :D

Renji: It's from SilverFox-Chan91:

_Ichigo: Cosplay as Naruto and kiss Aizen_

Ichigo: **…is working… **

Renji: …**shows up…** Haha, you have to work!

Ichigo: What do you want?

Renji: **…shows dare…**

Ichigo: Who? Ah, fine, whatever… **…dresses up as Naruto…**

Isshin: Hey!! Where do you think you're going??

Ichigo: I don't know… who knows where Aizen went?

Urahara: I saw him sneak out the window~!

Ulquiorra: **…looks out window… **Ah, here he is.

Aizen: Dammit Ulquiorra! You're supposed to be on my side!

Ulquiorra: **…shrugs…**

Ichigo: **…sneaks up behind Aizen…taps his shoulder…**

Aizen: Huh? What do you want-!

Kris: That is wrong on so many levels…

Hirako: I agree

Kris: Oh hi! How's your hairstyle treating you?

Hirako: Could we move on please?

Razz: Sure, here read this

Hirako: Okay, this is also from SilverFox-Chan91

_Luppi: Go kill yourself, you worthless piece of **!_

Luppi: Worthless piece of two stars??

Razz: Yeah… sure, two stars… anyway, aren't you already dead?

Luppi: Oh, yeah… Grimmjow killed me…

Grimmjow: I'll do it again if it'll help!

Razz: I don't think that'll be necessary

Luppi: Alright… bye

Razz: Huh… alright, Hirako! Please continue!

Hirako: Um… okay:

_Ulquiorra:*glomps Ulqui*Confess your love for me and take me out to dinner_

Ulquiorra: Do I have to?

Razz: Yep

Ulquiorra: Why? Byakuya didn't have to marry the other girl from before!

Razz: Yes, but the other girl asked, this one is demanding.

Ulquiorra: Fine… **…goes and finds SilverFox-Chan91… **

SilverFox-Chan91: HI~!

Ulquiorra: I-…I love you…

SilverFox-Chan91: w

Ulquiorra: **…takes her to dinner…**

Razz: Um… how sweet… okay next dare!

Kris: **…steals paper from Hirako… **It says!

_Grimmjow:*glomps Grimmjow*Dress up like a cat and sing "Who let the dogs out"by"Baha Men_

Razz: Yes, go do that.

Grimmjow: Aww… but I don't want to…

Razz: Too bad, go on; go be a kitty-cat xD

Grimmjow: **…dresses as a cat…starts to sing…**

Who let the dogs out  
(woof, woof, woof, woof)  
(woof, woof, woof, woof)  
(woof, woof, woof, woof)  
(woof, woof, woof, woof)

Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)

(woof, woof, woof, woof)

When the party was nice, the party was jumpin' (Hey, Yippie, Yi, Yo)  
And everybody havin' a ball (Hah, ho, Yippie Yi Yo)  
I tell the fellas "start the name callin'" (Yippie Yi Yo)  
And the girls report to the call  
The poor dog show down

Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)

I see ya' little speed boat head up our coast  
She really want to skip town  
Get back off me, beast off me  
Get back you flea infested monger

Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)

I'm gonna tell {Hey, Yippie, Yi, Yo}  
To any girls calling them canine {Yippie, Yi, Yo}  
Tell the dummy "Hey Man, It's part of the Party!" {Yippie Yi, Yo}  
You fetch a women in front and her mans behind {Yippie, Yi, Yo}  
Her bone runs out now

Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)

Say, A doggy is nuttin' if he don't have a bone All dogy hold ya' bone, all doggy hold it  
A doggy is nuttin' if he don't have a bone All dogy hold ya' bone, all doggy hold it

Wait for y'all my dogs, the party is on  
I gotta get my girl I got my myind on  
Do you see the rays comin' from my eye  
What could you be friend  
That Benji man that's breakin' them down?  
Me and My white short shorts  
And I can't seek a lot, any canine will do  
I'm figurin' that's why they call me faithful  
'Cause I'm the man of the land  
When they see me they doah-ooooo(howl)

Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)  
Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)

Everyone: **…applauds…**

Grimmjow: Thankyou, thankyou, I'll be here all week

Razz: In that case, here read the next dare!

Grimmjow: …fine…

_Aizen: .You,go tell Pein from Naruto that your better then him, then Pein will tear you to shreds and I'll be laughing in the background_

Aizen: I'm not having a good day…

Kris: Haha! Too bad, you deserve it!

Pein: **…appears…**

Aizen: Hey you!

Pein: Me?

Aizen: yeah, you… I'm better then you!

Pein: Why you little!! **…rips Aizen to shreds…**

SilverFox-Chan91: **…from dinner table… **Haha!

Razz: Well… while you're here Pein, how about you read the next dare!

Pein: _Toshiro:Sing "Ice,Ice Baby"and makeout with Orihime_

Hitsugaya: Great… just great…

Kris: Hey, at least it's not some old guy

Hitsugaya: …Okay…**…begins to sing…**

Yo VIP let's kick it

Ice ice baby (x2)  
All right stop collaborate and listen  
Ice is back with my brand new invention  
Something grabs a hold of me tightly  
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly  
Will it ever stop yo I don't know  
Turn off the lights and I'll glow  
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal  
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle  
Dance go rush to the speaker that booms  
I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom  
Deadly when I play a dope melody  
Anything less than the best is a felony  
Love it or leave it you better gain weight  
You better hit bull's eye the kid don't play  
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

CHORUS  
Ice ice baby vanillla (x4)

Now that the party is jumping  
With the bass kicked in and the vegas are pumpin'  
Quick to the point to the point no faking  
I'm cooking MC's like a pound of bacon  
Burning them if you ain't quick and nimble  
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal  
And a hi-hat with a souped up tempo  
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo  
Rollin' in my 5.0  
With my rag-top down so my hair can blow  
The girlies on standby waving just to say hi  
Did you stop no I just drove by  
Kept on pursuing to the next stop  
I busted a left and I'm heading to the next block  
The block was dead  
Yo so I continued to A1A Beachfront Avenue  
Girls were hot wearing less than bikinis  
Rockman lovers driving Lamborghinis  
Jealous 'cause I'm out getting mine  
Shay with a guage and Vanilla with a nine  
Reading for the chumps on the wall  
The chumps acting ill because they're so full of eight balls  
Gunshots rang out like a bell  
I grabbed my nine all I heard were shells  
Falling on the concrete real fast  
Jumped in my car slammed on the gas  
Bumpet to bumper the avenue's packed  
I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack  
Police on the scene you know what I mean  
They passed me up confronted all the dope fiends  
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

REPEAT CHORUS

Take heed 'cause I'm a lyrical poet  
Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it  
My town that created all the bass sound  
Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground  
'Cause my style's like a chemical spill  
Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel  
Conducted and formed  
This is a hell of a concept  
We make it hype and you want to step with this  
Shay plays on the fade slice like a ninja  
Cut like a razor blade so fast other DJs say damn  
If my rhyme was a drug I'd sell it by the gram  
Keep my composure when it's time to get loose  
Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice  
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while Shay revolves it

Ice ice baby vanilla  
Ice ice baby (oh-oh) vanilla  
Ice ice baby vanilla  
Ice ice baby vanilla ice  
Yo man let's get out of here  
Word to your mother  
Ice ice baby too cold  
Ice ice baby too cold too cold (x2)  
Ice ice baby

Orihime: **…claps…**

Hitsugaya: **…bows…** Uh… can I get some help here?

Kris: Hahahahahahahaha!!! xD Shorty can't reach xD

Hitsugaya: SHUTUP!!! I AM NOT SHORT!!!  
Kris: That's what they all say…

Orihime: **…is clueless… **What can't he reach?

Kenpachi: **…feels sorry for Hitsugaya… picks him up so he can reach…**

Razz: Well… that looks awkward… and it also looks like we have only one more dare!  
Ichigo: Yes!

Razz: Don't get too excited, there will be more next chapter

Ichigo: AWwwww….

Razz: Here, read the last one!

Ichigo: Fine, it says:

_Renji:Die your hair blue_

Rukia: HAH!

Renji: Shut up you…

Kris: **…feels she has hair styling expertise… dyes Renji's hair…**

Renji: Hey!! That's not so bad!

Kris: It's excellent, if I do say so myself!

Razz: Yes… very nice, well that's all folks! I thought I'd never get through all these dares… I'll try extra hard to update sooner next time, but you can all help me by only putting one or two dares in. If you have lots of good ideas, you can just put them in next time! =) Thanks so much for reading, hope you enjoy! ^ ^

Kris: Come back next time =D


	5. Carols of Wonderment

Razz: Aaand~ we're back~! I've been gone for ages! I'm sooooo sorry… =[ I tried really hard to get this chapter awesome to make up for taking so long. I will try to update again ASAP, but I'm not going to promise anything, because I know I will fail… D:

Hitsugaya: Oh, goodie…

Razz: Eh? What's up with you?

Hitsugaya: I dread this… everyone always picks on me **…sobs…**

Razz: Um…oh-kay…

Ichigo: Please tell me there are no reviews…

Razz: That would be lying, besides, why would I write this if there were no dares?

Ichigo: Oh yeah…

Razz: Thanks to everyone who has reviewed this chapter! You guys are awesome! And by the way… I know I only introduced the 2-dare-rule last chapter, so I'll let it slide this time, but next chapter (and hopefully there will be one) if you give me more then two I'll just pick your best two.

Ichigo: You talk too much

Razz: Fine! On to the dares~!

Hitsugaya: **…facepalms…** I hate you all…

Razz: The first dare is from our old friend Charliechick!

Hirako: Eeep! **…runs away…**

Razz: **…grins… **Her first dare is as follows:

_Hahaha well done Razz, this chapter made me lol xD_

_Okay, dares... Razz may remember while she was editing that last chapter the spell-checker kept trying to change Hirako's name to 'Hark'. I therefore release his hair of the braids, so it can be all long, curly and angel like and I dare him to sing parts of "Hark! The herald angels sing" at random times throughout the chapter. The other Vizards can be the backing choir._

Hirako: **…continues running…**

Kris: Oh no, you don't! **…drags back…releases golden locks…**

Razz: Okay, come on, sing for your audience!

Hirako:

On the first day of Christmas~

Kris: Hey! That's the wrong song!

Hirako: **...sighs…**

Hark the Herald angels sing

Glory to the new born king~

Peace on Earth and Mercy mild

God and sinners reconciled~!

Kris: **…claps…**

Vizard: _My true love gave to me~!_

Kris: Um… guys, that's the wrong song

Vizard: **…shrug…**

Razz: Righty… well let's get on shall we! The next dare is also from charliechick!

_And let's see...who hasn't been dared yet..._

_I dare Mayuri to invent an ultra-super-awesome-smexy-wonder belt for the captains. Little do they know that whenever the special button is pressed, a giant flying tree octopus starts attacking Nnoitra._

_Have fun ;)_

Razz: Awww, poor Nnoitra.

Nnoitra: What?

Razz: Never you mind… Ishida! Mayuri! Report for duty!

Ishida and Mayuri: **…appear… **What? What's going on?

Razz: Right, Mayuri, I hereby command you to invent an ultra-super-awesome-smexy-wonder belt!

Ishida: What am I here for?

Razz: You shall design and make them.

Mayuri: Why can't I do everything?

Kris: Because you will have your hands full with the inventing. Do Not Forget The Button!

Mayuri: Whatever you say… **…gets to work…**

SOMETIME LATER

Mayuri: They are complete! **…holds up in impressed manner…hands out to all captains…**

Yamamoto: Ooh! A wonder belt! OH! It has a button! What joyousness is to be had!!

Other Captains: **…are slightly less impressed with their belts…only slightly though…**

IN HUECO MUNDO

Nnoitra: **…is minding own business for once… **AH!!! What the- ARGHH!!!!!!

Ulquiorra: Quiet, trash.

Nnoitra: BUTbutbut, there are… things! GIANT FLYING TREE OCTOPUS THINGS!!! And they're attackingme!!! ATTACKING MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Grimmjow: Geez, you're such a wimp Nnoitra.

BACK AT WHERE EVER WE ARE

Kris: teehee

Hitsugaya: **…breathes sigh of relief… mutters…** for now I am safe…

Hirako: **…singing…**

Joyful all ye nations rise

Join the triumph of the skies~!

Vizard: _A partridge in a pear tree~!_

Razz: Next dare~! Do I have a volunteer?

Nnoitra: **…runs past screaming…**

Giant flying tree octopus: **…chases…stops… **Lovely day for it! **…disappears…**

Razz: No? Okay then, the next dare is from x-x SilverRain x-x, and it goes as follows:

_YAY~! You did my dare! Well, now that I've embarrassed the Soul Society, now for Hueco Mundo's humiliation! I dare Ulquiorra to grope Grimmjow (in the place where the sun don't shine ;3) every time someone says 'dare'. Have fun with this!! xD You make me laugh!_

Ulquiorra: Shan't.

Grimmjow: You're such a baby!

Ulquiorra: Are you seriously trying to tell me that you wish to be groped every time that somebody says 'dare'?

Gin: He said it! He said it! Do what you have to do Ulqui~!

Ulquiorra: **…shudders…**

Grimmjow: Wait? What's going on? ULQUIORRA!!! WTF DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!!!!!!!

Ulquiorra: Whatever is necessary

Razz: Okay, creepy, anyways, that's all from x-x SilverRain x-x, lets move on!

Hirako: **…takes deep breath…**

With angelic host proclaim

Christ is born in Bethlehem~

Hark the herald angels sing

Glory to the new born king~!

Vizard: _On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~!  
_Kris: I don't think they get the concept of being a choir…

Orihime: Can I read the next dare??

Grimmjow: **…in distance… **Don't touch me!!! YOU FREAK!!!

Razz: Sure!

Orihime: Well, it's from Henty1993:

_I dare Ichigo to passionately make out with Orihime, Grimmjow to do the same with Ulquiorra! then they have to swap! to then it will be ichigoXgrimmjow and ulquiorraXorihime then another swap to its orihimeXgrimmjow ichigoXulqiuorra and the kissing has to be with tongue, sloppy and groping! body parts! ^^ like you were with your loved one!_

_(Orihime is going to have fun with Ichigo *wink wink*)_

_enjoy playing Tonsil tennis ^^_

_Muhahahaha!_

Gin: There! They said dare again! And I said it! That make twice :P

Ulquiorra: **…sighs… gropes…**

Grimmjow: **...tries to flee… fails…**

Razz: Well… Ichigo, Orihime, Grimmjow, Ulquiorra! Do you understand your mission?

All: **…nod…**

Razz: Good, because I didn't. Now get to work!

What ensues in the next space in time is not suitable for innocent eyes and so will not be repeated here. Instead, feel free to take a cookie from the communal plate. Be warned, Orihime cooked them…

Ulquiorra: That. Was. Disgusting…

Orihime: Don't lie Ulquiorra, we all know you loved every minute.

Grimmjow: I don't feel so good…

Ichigo: **…washes mouth out thoroughly…**

Razz: Well… that went well… Next dare!!

Grimmjow: **…smashes Ulquiorra's face in… **ENOUGH WITH THE GROPING!!!

Razz: …Anywho, Gin, you seem to be enjoying yourself, how about you read some dares!

Ulquiorra: **…from background… **Stop saying that word trash!!

Gin: **…grins… **Well, this one 'ere is again from Henty1993

_and I have another dare!_

_*I dare Byakuya to use it artistic talents to act like Vincent from house of wax and make wax models of Ichigo, Renji, Rukia, Orihime, the Mr hanky thing Byakuya likes making, and any one else you wouldn't mind doing ^^_

Grimmjow: **...shrieks in anger…**

Byakuya: I'll make everyone!

AGES LATER

Byakuya reveals his masterpieces. They stand in their resplendent glory and he is epically proud.

Rukia: Nii-sama! You're so talented!

Ichigo: **…whispers… **They all look the same to me…

Renji: I agree

Kris: They all look like that retarded ghosty thinga, just different colours…

Razz: **..coughs… splutters… bursts out laughing…**

Byakuya: Is there something wrong with her??

Hirako: **…clears throat…**

Christ by highest heaven adored

Christ the everlasting Lord~

Late in time, behold him come

Offspring of a virgins womb~!

Vizard: _On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Three French hens~_

_Two Turtle Doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~!_

Hirako: WILL YOU PLEASE SING THE RIGHT SONG!!??!

Hiyori: Shut up, baldy

Gin: The next _**dare**_; that's your cue, Ulqui! Is from xxmimix3!

_well first things first -smirks and glomps Ukitake- Yay! _

_anyway! I dare the lovely Orihime to try and make Renji her **. And if he refuses to do what she says than she has to pimp smack him and say "**! Ima cut you!"_

Grimmjow: BACK OFF EMOPANTS!!  
Razz: Orihime, off you go…

Orihime: What is with people and stars??

Razz: just… Just go…

Renji: Hey Orihime! What's up?

Orihime: Be my **!!

Renji: What?! No way!!

Orihime: Fine then! **…pimp slaps…**

Renji: Oww!! What the hell was that for?

Orihime: ** Ima cut you!!

Renji: **…marvels at Orihime's star saying prowess…**

Gin: My turn! The next dare is also from xxmimix3;

Ulquiorra: How long do I have to keep doing this??

Gin: for the whole chapter!!

Ulquiorra: **…mutters… **trash…

Gin: _And before Grimmjow takes that cat costume off he has to sing the "Cat, I'm a Kitty Cat" song :3 -throws catnip at Grimmjow and runs- _

_Bye guys 3_

Gin: **…waves… **Bye bye now!

Grimmjow: What if I have removed that stupid costume!? What are you gonna do then??!

Razz: Put it back on you, duh

Grimmjow: **…resigns himself to his fate…**

Cat! I'm a kitty cat.

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat? I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat? I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat! I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat? I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat! I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Provocative posing!

Provocative posing!

Cat! I'm a [Chiquita]!

And I meow, meow, meow and I meow, meow, meow.

Cat? I'm a kitty cat.

And I meow, meow, meow and I meow, meow, meow.

Cat! I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance, da-da-dance, dance, dance.

Cat?! I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

I say sexy things to myself while I'm da-ancing.

I say sexy things to myself while I'm da-ancing.

Provocative posing!

Provocative posing!

Cat! I'm a pitty pat!

And I poo, poo, poo, peedee, dee, pah pah.

Cat! I'm the kitty cat!

And I meow, meow, meow and I meow, meow, meow.

Cat? I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance.

Cat? I'm the kitty cat!

And I meow, meow, meow and I meow, meow, meow.

Cat. I'm a kitty cat!

And I dance, dance, dance and I dance, dance, dance**.**

All: **…stare in disbelief…**

Grimmjow: What I don't understand is why I always have to do cat related things! I'm not a cat, I'm a panther, and there is a difference people!!  
Razz: Please ignore him, and let us continue…

Hirako: **…interrupts…**

Veiled in flesh the Godhead see~

Hail the incarnate deity~!

Vizard: _On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~_

_Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~!_

Razz: Yes, very nice…

Hinamori: I wanna read the next dare!

Gin: Sure! Ulquiorra, I hope you're doing your duty!!

Hinamori: The next dare is from BeeBee432;

_I wanna dare Ichigo to lock Rukia in a room showing her a 3 hour detailed movie bout bunnies being butchered and cooked then eaten. If Rukia resist or scream he has to sexually harass her. The events in the room has to be video taped then played in front of the whole soul society._

Razz: **…sarcastically… **Yay… more harassment….

Ichigo: **..whines… **Why me?

Kris: I don't think you should be complaining, you've got off lightly so far!

Razz: And besides, Rukia is the one being tortured, not you.

Ichigo: Yeah, well, that doesn't mean I'm going to like it…

Rukia: What's going on? Why are you taking me this way Ichigo? Hey! Why are you locking the door??

Ichigo: Shush…

Rukia: Hey a movie! What one is it?

Ichigo: Here, look. **…puts on 'Rabbit Killer V3®'…**

Rukia: Um… Why would you want to watch that?

Ichigo: Shut up and watch it!

They sit and watch the movie. They get one hour through it and Rukia still hasn't made a sound. The reason for this is that she realised that the 'V3' meant that it will go for three hours and has fainted. Ichigo finally cracks at the senseless violence and runs screaming out of the room. The camera catches all and is later shown to soul society.

Kris: If Ichigo was the one who chickened out, does that mean that Rukia has to harass him?

Razz: I have no idea…

Hirako: **…appears resplendent in drag…**

Pleased as man with man to dwell~

Jesus our Emmanuel~!

Vizard: _On the Fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a-_

Grimmjow: Will you SHUT UP!! This is not a Christmas special, it doesn't look like a Christmas special, it's not even close to Christmas!!! So stop singing!!!

Vizard: **…timidly…**

_-partridge in a pear tree~!_

Grimmjow: **…goes mental…**

Razz: Hinamori, if you would.

Hinamori: Right. The next dare is kindly provided by xMidnight-Spiritx

_Poor Toshiro I feel sorry for him..._

_I dare Ulquiorra to kiss Orihime and I dare Renji to cut off his pigtail..._

Gin: That's three Ulqui~!

Ulquiorra: I KNOW!!

Grimmjow: Wow, emopants just got angry… DON'T TOUCH ME THERE!!!

Hitsugaya: You should feel sorry for me.

Razz: Why? Nothing's happened to you yet this chapter.

Hitsugaya: And I hope it stays that way.

Ulquiorra: Why am I the object of torture for this chapter?

Razz: Hey, it had to be someone.

Ulquiorra: **…sighs…kisses Orihime…**

Renji: I will not cut off my pigtail!!

Razz: Anyone from the audience wish to volunteer?

Barrigan: I wish to volunteer.

Renji: Who's that old dude? And volunteer for what?

Razz: **…hands old dude scissors…**

Old dude, sorry, Barrigan: **…chops off Renji's pigtail…laughs mockingly… **DIE INSECT!!!

Renji: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!  
Hinamori: **…stifles laughter…**

Hirako: **…chuckles…**

Hark the herald angles sing~

Glory to the new born king~!

Vizard: _On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Kris: Did Hirako say that there were herald _angles??_

Razz: I believe so…

Omaeda: The next dare is from QueenSunset;

_For a dare in the next chapter I dare Urahara to kiss Yoruichi, Renji to kiss Rukia and Ichigo to kiss Orihime._

Soi Fon: Omaeda? What are you doing here? Where is here?

Razz: …You'll find out soon enough… Urahara! Yoruichi! Renji! Rukia! Ichigo! Orihime!

Above mentioned people: YES MA'AM!!

Razz: Well, don't just stand there, do what you have been told to do!

And amidst much grumbling… It was done.

Urahara: Hmmmm…. That wasn't so bad… Come back here Yoruichi!

Yoruichi: **…flees…**

Omaeda: The dare after that one goes as follows:

Hirako: You forgot to say who it was from!

Hail the heaven-born Prince of Peace~  
Hail the Son of Righteousness~!

Omaeda: What was that about?

Vizard: _On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Seven swans a-swimming~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Omaeda: Oh…kay then…. The next dare, or should I say dares, are from… AnimeLuver4everandevr.

_Ichigo: I dare you to burn Chappy._

_Rukia: To punch Ichigo in the face and save your precious Chappy._

_Momo: To grab Toushiro and kiss him, on the lips._

_Rangiku: To hug Toushiro tightly between your...mountains._

_Ukitake: Give Shiro-chan watermelon flavoured candy._

_Toushiro: To eat it, to act like a child for the whole chapter, take naps and suck your thumb while clutching a chappy bunny rabbit._

_Ulquiorra ,Gin, and Grimmjow: Make a commercial with the 'meow mix' song. Grimmjow being the kitty._

_And that's it. ^-^ I love these dares._

Kris: Hey Omaeda…

Omaeda: Yes?

Kris: You're only supposed to read one dare at a time…

Omaeda: Oh… Oh well

Razz: Alright everyone, get to work.

Ichigo: Okay… where am I going to get a chappy from?

Byakuya: Rukia has plenty in her room

Ichigo: Right. **…goes to Rukia's room…returns with chappy and lighter…**

Rukia: Hey! What are you doing with Chappy!?  
Ichigo: Bwahahaha!!! Burn you stupid rabbit!!!  
Rukia: NOOOooooo!!!! CHAPPY! NO!!!!!

Ichigo: **…continues to laugh manically…**

Rukia: Why you little! **…punches Ichigo in the face…pulls half burnt Chappy from his hands…**

Hinamori: Hah! Sucked in Ichigo!

Rangiku: **…looks at dares… **More like sucked in Hitsugaya! And he thought he was going to get let off this time!

Hinamori: Hey Hitsugaya!

Hitsugaya: Yeah?

Hinamori: **…grabs Hitsugaya…kisses him…**

Hitsugaya: …What the hell?

Rangiku: Come here, you little short man!

Hitsugaya: Rangiku! Aargh!!! Lemme go!!! HELP ME SOMEONE!!

Ukitake: I bet you're enjoying that…

Hitsugaya: I am NOT! Let me go! Get off of me!

Rangiku: **…pouts… **Fine then…

Ukitake: Here, have this **…hands candy…**

Hitsugaya: What is it?

Ukitake: Candy

Hitsugaya: Why?

Ukitake: I don't know, because that's what it's called?

Hitsugaya: **…takes cautiously… eats…falls asleep with magically appeared chappy rabbit…**

Ukitake: Well… that was quick…

Grimmjow: **…kicks sleeping Hitsugaya…**

Gin: that wasn't very nice! He was only doing his _**dare**_…

Ulquiorra: I will kill you Gin

Grimmjow: Again with the cat stuff! Why cat stuff?!

Gin: Come on little Ulqui~, Grimm-kitty~! Let's get to work!

Grimmjow: **…sits on floor…**

I want Meow Mix  
I want Meow Mix  
More salmon flavour

More salmon flavour

Gin: Something fishy is going on with MeowMix!

Ulquiorra: They added more delicious salmon flavour

Gin: To the chicken, turkey, and salmon taste cats love

Ulquiorra: So give him the taste he's fishing for!

Grimmjow: **…tries to stand…**

Gin: **…shoves Grimmjow down again…**

Grimmjow: **…growls…**

I want Meow Mix  
I want Meow Mix  
More salmon flavour

More salmon flavour

Ulquiorra: MeowMix brand cat food with more salmon flavour

Gin: The only cat food that tastes so good

Ulquiorra: Cats ask for it by name!

Grimmjow: Meow.

All: **…applaud…**

Razz: Well that was … lovely

Grimmjow: I hate you all

Kris: Well that's not very nice :O

Grimmjow: **…shrugs…**

Razz: That's that lot, lets move on!

Hirako: **…does a twirl…**

Light and life to all he brings~

Risen with healing in His wings~!

Ulquiorra: Oh great… Him again

Vizard:_ ON the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Eight maids a-milking~_

_Seven swans a-swimming~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Orihime: Is it just me, or do they sing for longer each time?

Ishida: Of course they sing for longer! They add a whole line each time!

Orihime: Oh.

Kon: I wanna read!

Razz: Um, sure

Kon: AAALLLRIGGGHTTY!!!! This next dare is from…Toa Solaric!!!

_Hirako: you going to had a make-out session with Hinamori in front of everyone ever Hiyori_

Hirako: But I'm an angel! An angel would never do such a terrible thing!

Kris: Just do it.

Hinamori: What does he have to do?

Hirako: This **…has make-out session…**

Hiyori: What do you think you're doing baldy? She's too young for you!  
Kon: MOOOVVVINGG OONNNN!!!!!

Razz: Why are you talking like that?

Kon: The next dare is from…ta da~! YukiKitsune103!!

_I want Ichigo to cosplay as Naruto and Ishida cosplay as Sasuke, and have the 2 of them battle each other out like the Valley of the End scene in Naruto._

Ichigo: Okay then… **…becomes Naruto-ish…**

Ishida: Who?

Razz: Sasuke

Ishida: Again, who?

Kris: **…brings in internet…shows stuff on Sasuke…**

Ishida: **…sighs…becomes Sasuke-ish…**

Razz: Very nice, now, fight!

Ichigo: **…goes ninja and fights…**

Ishida: **…does likewise…**

LATER

Orihime: I declare a draw!

Razz: Finally, when they get better, they're gonna have to clean all this up though…

Kon: Next dare!!! Is still from YukiKitsune103:

_And also, in response to my Toushirou kissing Gin dare, I want Gin to propose to Toushirou with an ice ring that won't melt...at the beach and in the HOTTEST swimming trunks anyone can think of. WID EVERYONE RANGING FROM SOUL SOCIETY TO HUECO MUNDO TO THE REAL WORLD THERE TO WITNESS._

Gin: Oh… goody…

Razz: Well, off you go then!

Gin: **…looks at Hitsugaya… **He's still sleeping… and eating his own finger… and he's already got a rabbit…

Razz: Hey, no-one said it was going to be easy!

Hitsugaya: **…wakes up and realises he's on the beach…**

Gin: **…holds out giant icy ring of the non-melting variety…** Hitsugaya… Will you marry me?

Hitsugaya: **…yawns… takes ring… sticks it in his mouth…**

Gin: Is that a yes or a no?

Hitsugaya: Are you my mummy?

Kon: I say that's a yes!!!

Kris: How d'you figure?

Kon: **…runs away…**

Kris: Right… Well, I'll read the next dare then…

Hirako: **stands on top of rubble…**

Mild he lays his glory by~

Born that man no more may die~!

Vizard: _On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me~  
Nine ladies dancing~_

_Eight maids a-milking~_

_Seven swans a-swimming~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Grimmjow: I am so sick of this place…

Kris: If I may continue… **…glares at Hirako… **The next dare is from shinigami748:

_I dare Ichigo and Rukia to make out in front of Byakuya and Byakuya is allowed to kill Ichigo_

Rukia: This should be interesting…

Ichigo: I don't want to die!

Byakuya: What are you two doing?

Ichigo: **…can't talk…**

Byakuya: Hmmph… **…cuts Ichigo's head off…**

Rukia: Nii-Sama! That wasn't nice!!  
Byakuya: **…runs…**

Razz: Hahaha

Kris: Next dare?

Razz: Yes! It's from Who Knows Who I Am

_I THOUGHT OF A DARE! (I'm very proud of myself now. tee-hee)_

_I dare gin and *enter character name here* to have a staring contest... whoever loses will be stuck giving piggy back rides to every character in the room (make sure Yachiru, Kenpachi, and ikkaku are there)_

Gin: YAY! Staring!

Hitsugaya: Mummy is scary…

Gin: Do I have a volunteer?

Hanatarou: I'll do it!

Everyone: **…stares in shock…**

Razz: Okay… Hanatarou and Gin; let the staring contest begin!

LONG TIME LATER

Renji: Don't you think it's a bit unfair… Gin's eyes aren't open…

Kris: Oh yeah!

Aizen: It is a test of the young one's determination!

Kris and Renji: **…back away slowly…**

EVEN MORE LATER

Hirako: There is need for a musical interlude!!!

BORN TO RAISE THE SONS OF EARTH~

BORN TO GIVE THEM SECOND BIRTH~!

Vizard: _ON THE TENTH DAY OF CHRISTMAS MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME~_

_Ten lords a-leaping~_

_Nine ladies dancing~_

_Eight maids a- milking~_

_Seven swans a-swimming~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Yamamoto: **…stops dancing… **Ah… verygood… yes… very, very good…

AND AGAIN…LATER

Gin: ARGH! I give up… you win…

Hanatarou: Yay!

Razz: Well Gin, piggybacks for all!

Ikkaku: Me first! Me first!

Kenpachi: Me second! Me second!

Yachiru: Me first! Me first!

Ikkaku: I already dibbsed first!

Yachiru: **…chucks a tantrum…**

Ikkaku: Fine…

Kris: Me too!

Razz: Well, while that's going on, we'll have the next dare!

Yamamoto: **…wisely… **It's not a dare

Everyone: What is it?

Yamamoto: A competition!

Ichigo: I'm going to win.

Yamamoto: It was sent in by Who Knows Who I Am and goes as follows:

_whoever can get Wonderweiss to say something besides his own name can be exempt from dares for say... one chapter?_

Wonderweiss: Uuaahh~!

Ichigo: Hey retard! Say something!

Wonderweiss: … Aaaaaaaaaaaaah

Razz: Fail

Ishida: **…says a whole bunch of intellectual things…**

Wonderweiss: ooooooooooh

Razz: Fail

AFTER MANY FAILURES

Tosen: Hello Wonderweiss

Wonderweiss: Hnnnnn

Razz: Fail

Tosen: **…glares… **I'm not finished yet.

Razz: Okay, what ever…

Tosen: Wonderweiss how are you doing today?

Wonderweiss: Gooooooooooood

Tosen: Wonderful! These people are quite… impure, aren't they?

Wonderweiss: Theeeeey aaaaaaall smeeeeeeell!

Razz: Despite the elongated vowels I think we can safely declare Tosen the winner of the competition!

Aizen: Good work, my children!

Wonderweiss: Neeeeeeext daaaaaareeeeeee?

Razz: Yes!

Yamamoto: From Who Knows Who I Am:

_oh, and Rukia must watch as Ichigo and Renji burn chappy. =) sorry. I felt I had to add something a bit evil in there._

Renji: Yes! No more stupid rabbits!!!

Ichigo: And she can't stop us this time!!!  
Rukia: NOOOOOO!!!! CCCCHHHHAAAAPPPYYY!!!!!!!!!!

Chappy: **…goes up in flames…**

Rukia: **…cries…gets piggyback from Gin…cries some more…**

Chappy's ghost: The next dare is from DreamOfDarkBlueEyes…

_Here's one for Ichigo! I dare Ichigo to take his shirt off and grab Uryuu-chan by the waist and kiss him...anywhere is fine by me and Uryuu-chan should not struggle Bwahahahahaha!_

Rukia: Chappy???

Chappy's ghost: **…disappears…**

Kris: **…is observant… **Isn't Ichigo supposed to be dead?

Byakuya: Correct. I killed him…

Ichigo: **…shrugs… **Guess you didn't do a very good job then…

Razz: Ichigo! Do your dare and hurry up about it!

Ichigo: Fine… **…takes off shirt and grabs Ishida…**

Ishida: Ichigo? What are you doing?

Ichigo: **…kisses…**

Ishida: Oh…

…

…

…

…

Razz: Anyway… Next dare!

Gin: **…currently piggybacking Hallibel… **It's from Okibimaru and it says:

_haha that was a funny chapter I was laughing and my family didn't know why so now they think I'm mad_

_next dare, I dare Rukia, Inoue and any other female members of the bleach cast to ever come in contact with Ichigo to form a gang and keep preforming pointless and hilarious pranks until Ichigo finally stops scowling and smiles properly_

Ichigo: I do smile properly!

Razz: Obviously not

Orihime/Rukia/Nel/Yachiru/Yoruichi/others: WOOOT we're a gang!!!  
Ichigo: Oh goody…

Gang: **…goes into planning mode…**

Ichigo: **…sneaks away…**

Razz: While they plan let us continue with some dares, the next one is from apola55:

_oh Byakuya that wasn't a question either marry me or get your brains shot out and no you have no choice! and you git this crappy plastic ring cuz you tried to steal my diamond Orihime go out with Grimmjow Ulquiorra try to steal Orihime away from Grimm-kitty XD and uryu make me a wedding dress ok that's all_

Aizen: I have noted that she seems rather hyper…

Byakuya: So I have to marry this…human.

Razz: Yes, yes you do.

Ishida: **…makes wedding dress…**

Kris: Ah… Ishida?  
Ishida: What?

Kris: Why did you make two dresses?

Ishida: One for each **…nods wisely…**

Ichigo: **…cracks up laughing…**

Apola55: **…appears…gets in wedding dress…**

Byakuya: Why do I have to wear a dress??

Razz: For my own amusement, now go and get married!

Byakuya and Apola55 walk down the isle and only one of them looks happy about it…

Hirako: Hark the Herald Angels sing~

Glory toooooo the New Born KING~~~~~!!!!

Vizard: _On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Eleven pipers piping~  
Ten lords a-leaping~_

_Nine ladies dancing~_

_Eight maids a- milking~_

_Seven swans a-swimming~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE GOLDEN RINGS~_

_Four calling birds~_

_Three French hens~  
Two turtle doves~_

_And a partridge in a pear tree~_

Razz: Well… that was a refreshing change from 'Here comes the bride'…

Kris: Indeed…

Renji: So…who's performing the ceremony?

Razz: Hanatarou, seeing as he's done it before

Hanatarou: Ladies and Gentleman we stand before you today to witness the um… marriage of these two…people. Do you Byakuya; take this woman Apola55 to be your wife?

Byakuya: I have to, don't I?

Hanatarou: Ummm….

Razz: Just do it properly Byakuya

Byakuya: I do…

Hanatarou: and do you Apola55 take this… man, um, to be your husband?

Apola55: **…squeals… **I do!

Hanatarou: Good… good… um, well that's it… nice seeing you all again… **…runs away…**

Razz: Okey-dokey… Orihime, Grimmjow, get on with it!

Grimmjow: fine… **…takes Orihime out…**

Ulquiorra: **…steals Orihime…**

Orihime: Hey! Put me down!

Ulquiorra: No… I'm stealing you!

Razz: Hmmm… well then…

Ichigo: **…sits…gets thumbtack in the butt… **OOOWWWW!!!

All: HAHAHAHAHHaaahahaha

Szayel: The next dare belongs to Goku76

_hahahahahaha, this is one funny story alright. _

_Shinji Hirako dressing like Kurt Cobain from the 90's and singing Smells like Teen Spirit_

Orihime: Hey Ichigo!

Ichigo: What?

Orihime: Turn around!

Ichigo: **…turns…gets a pie in the face…**

Gang: Yes! Direct hit!!

Hirako: Oi! You lot! You're stealing my glory!

Rukia: What glory? You have to dress like some guy and sing a song… where's the glory in that?

Hirako: **…huffs indignantly… dresses like Kurt Cobain… begins to sing…**

Load up on guns bring your friends

Its fun to lose and to pretend

She's over-bored, self-assured

Oh no, I know a dirty word

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello

With the lights out it's less dangerous

here we are now, entertain us

I feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us!

A mulatto, an albino

A mosquito, my libido

Yeah, hey, yay

I'm worse at what I do best

And for this gift I feel blessed

Our little group has always been

And always will until the end

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello

With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us

I feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us

A mulatto, an albino

A mosquito, my libido

Yeah, hey, yay

And I forget just why I taste

Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile

I found it hard, it's hard to find

Oh well, whatever, never mind

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, hello

With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us

I feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us

A mulatto, an albino

A mosquito, my libido

A denial, a denial

A denial, a denial

A denial, a denial

A denial, a denial

A denial

…**cue dramatic ending…**

All: **…great amounts of applause…**

Hirako: There is my glory!!!!!!!

Szayel: Our next dare comes from Mikazuki Mitsukai

_I want Razz to Stare manically and grin at Byakuya for an extended amount of time before announcing, "I have new socks on."_

Razz: Hahaha!!

Byakuya: Why are you laughing so gleefully?

Razz: **…stares…**

Byakuya: Are you alright?

Razz: **…grins widely… stares manically…sniggers…**

Byakuya: … I worry for you…

Razz: **…continues...**

Byakuya: **…looks for a way out…**

Szayel: The next dare after that is from '

_I dare Grimmjow to get Hitsugaya-kun sexually violated then gin has to take I dunno photographs or a video? you choose of them in the act...then maybe the kurosaki twins can watch...you choose how they all react...especially Ichigo and isshin upon seeing their angels' innocence being stolen before their eyes..._

Ulquiorra: That is a very complicated dare…

Gin: You said dare!! You brought that upon yourself!!  
Grimmjow: STOP TOUCHING MEEEEE!!!! **…sobs…**

Razz: **…hasn't stopped staring…**

Byakuya: stop that at once!

Razz: I have new socks on!

Byakuya: …Really…

Razz: No, actually, I have no socks on at all

Gin: You are going to violate this child who thinks I'm his mummy!? This I must document!

Grimmjow: But… but I don't want to!

Razz: Tough.

Grimmjow: **…does what he has to do…**

Gin: **…films event documentary style…**

LATER

Gin: **…emerges… **I have the footage!!

Karin: Footage of what?

Gin: Would you like to see??

Yuzu: Yes!

Karin: But Yuzu, we don't know what it is!

Yuzu: He looks like a nice man, it can't be too bad

Gin: Yes… I'm a very nice man… **…sits… **Come, come and view my footage!!  
Karin: **…sits… **I still don't trust you…

Yuzu: **…also sits and looks on in awe…**

…

…

Karin: Who are they and what on earth are they doing??

Ichigo: Gin!? What are you showing them?!?

Yuzu: It's a movie!

Isshin: **…looks… **ARGHHHH!!!!! Why would you show my precious angels such filth!!!!

Ichigo: **...grabs Karin and Yuzu and takes them away…**

Gin: **…runs…**

Isshin: **…gives chase...**

Razz: I have good news and I have bad news

Ichigo: Bad news first

Razz: We only have two reviews left!! :O

Ichigo: I asked for the bad news first!

Razz: That _**was**_ the bad news

Ichigo: So, what's the good news??

Razz: If the kind readers review again, there will be another chapter!!!!

Ichigo: That's terrible….

Razz: and remember folks, the crazier the dare, the better :D

Nnoitra: **…runs past screaming…**

All: **…look at Hitsugaya who is gurgling and pressing his wonder belt…**

Nnoitra: SAAAAVVVVVEEEEE MEMEMEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Razz: … Right…

Aaroniero: The next dare is from Rokka-chan

_I dare for all of the Espada (and gin, Aizen and Tosen) to say their deepest, darkest, most shameful secret!_

Razz: Oh goody!!

Espada: **…collectively groan…**

Razz: Oh yeah! Tosen…

Tosen: Yes?

Razz: You are exempt from this dare.

Tosen: **…breathes sigh of relief…**

Razz: Let's start at the bottom! Aaroniero, you're up!

Aaroniero: Well… I… I………Do I have to say this?

Kris: Yeppers

Aaroniero: I … sometimes secretly spyonpeopleintheshower….

Grimmjow: What? What did he say?

Kris: YOU PERVERT!!! .

Aaroniero: **…is ashamed…**

Zommari: I believe that I am next…

Razz: Why would you volunteer for that? Besides, you're not next, Szayel is.

Szayel: I like to wear women's clothes!

Kris: That's… not exactly a secret…

Szayel: Fine, what ever… My deepest darkest secret is that secretly…secretly!... I AM A WOMAN!!!!

Aizen: Really?

Szayel: YES! I FOOLED YOU ALL!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!!!!!!  
Razz: Great… NEXT!

Zommari: I also have X-Ray vision

Starrk: Meaning what?

Zommari: I see you naked… all the time…. never ceasingly…

Kris: Great… so the Espada are made up of freaks and perverts… good to know…

Razz: Grimm-kitty! You're up!

Grimmjow: Well, secretly… I… I have a slight obsession with My Little Pony…

All: **…wth…**

Nnoitra: MY TURN!!!!!!

Ulquiorra: Quiet, trash!

Nnoitra: Secretly… in my room… I have a collection of cutlery deep enough to swim in… and I do swim in it quite frequently actually… Once I got lost but a kindly spoon pointed me to the exit…

Razz: I believe this is about the time in which it would be appropriate to be backing away slowly…

Kris: Or fleeing

Razz: Yeah, fleeing sounds real good right now…

Ichigo: **…barbie girl ring tone goes off…picks up embarrassedly…**

Mysterious caller: Hello? Hello?

Ichigo: Who is this?

Mysterious caller: **…giggling…to the side… **shhh… he'll hear you... Oh yeah, Hi, is your fridge running?

Ichigo: Um… yeah I think so

Mysterious caller: **…laughs uproariously… **WELL YOU'D BETTER GO CATCH IT THEN!!!!! **…bursts into hysterics…**

Ichigo: **…smiles… **This is… Rukia, isn't it?

Rukia/Gang: What!? How did you know???

Ichigo: I have you on caller ID

Rukia: Crap! **…hangs up…**

Razz: Well, Ulquiorra, I believe that you're up next!

Ulquiorra: Oh goody…

Grimmjow: So, hurry up and tell us what your secret is!

Ulquiorra: I… wet the bed… sometimes…

Aizen: WHAT!!! Why?

Ulquiorra: I have a crippling phobia of the colour white…

Kris: But you _**are**_ white…

Ulquiorra: I never said it was rational…

Hallibel: I'm going to come straight out and say it… I never sleep in my room…

Gin: Then where do you sleep?

Hallibel: Everyone else's closets.

Nnoitra: YOU SLEEP IN MY CLOSET!!!??!!??!

Hallibel: Some nights, not all nights…

Aizen: Everyone's closet?

Hallibel: Yep

Tosen: Even me?

Hallibel: Yeah

Kris: You next oldie!

Barrigan: Humph… Insolent child!

Gin: What's your secret, Grandpa?

Barrigan: I have a… _thing_… for people younger then myself…

Gin: When you say _thing… _do you mean like… attracted?

Barrigan: Of course! What else would I mean!?

Kris: But apart from Yamamoto there is no-one older than you!

Barrigan: Exactly…

Starrk: yeah, why do you think Cuuhlhourne is the way he is?!

Razz: **…shudders… **Let's not go into detail please…

Starrk: Anyways… My turn… My secret is that I eat road kill.

Hallibel: Eewww…

Starrk: And not only that!  
Razz: What? More??

Starrk: Yep, I also sniff all your butts when you're not paying attention!

All: **…vow to never again stop paying attention…**

Razz: I think it's Yammy's turn!

Yammy: YAY!

Grimmjow: it's not a good thing…

Yammy: YAY!!

Tosen: So… what is your secret Yammy?

Yammy: YAY!!!

Kris: That's an awesome secret…!!!!!!

Yammy: YAY!!!!

Razz: Seriously though, what is your secret?

Yammy: YAY!!!!!

Aizen: STOP SAYING YAY!  
Yammy: YAY!!!!!!

Ulquiorra: Silence, trash…

Yammy : YAY!!!!!!!

Hanatarou : He doesn't speak English…

All: WHAT!?!?!?!?

Hanatarou: That's why he hasn't appeared in any chapters so far… he doesn't speak more than a word of English!

Gin: And what is that one word?

Yammy: YAY!!!!!!!!

All: **…stare…**

Razz: how do you know that Hanatarou?

Hanatarou: I don't have to answer that, because I was not requested to tell my secret…

All: …

…

Aizen: I believe that we are up to Gin now

Gin: alright… Here's my big, horrible, scarring secret!

Hallibel: **…prepares to cover her ears…**

Gin: You know how I squint all the time?

Razz: What of it?

Gin: The reason for it is… Once, a long, long time ago… I saw Aizen naked…

All: **…are horrified…**

Aizen: What!?? _**That's why you squint?? **_Because of _**me!??**_

Gin: **…nods…**

Tosen: I can vouch for that…I was there; he is why I am blind…

Kris: HAHAHAhAHAhahahaha!!! Take that Aizen! Your butt is ugly!!!!!!!!

Aizen: It is not ugly!!! Would you like to see?

Starrk: No! no…

Hallibel: HELL NO!!!  
Grimmjow: NO!  
Ulquiorra: I do not wish to be like those two…

Aaroniero: no thanks

Razz: OKAY!!! Be quiet all of you!

Kris: Aizen, even though we do not particularly want to hear from you now… It's your turn…

Aizen: My secret is…. that I am your FATHER!!!

Razz: Who's father?

Aizen: Everyone's!!!

Kris: Seriously?

Aizen: Indeed, even you, yes _**you**_, reading this now! I AM YOUR FATHER!!! All those 'clever' men out there, thinking they're fathers… YOU'RE ALL WRONG!! I AM EVERYBODY'S FATHHERRRRRRRR!!!!!

Hallibel: Wow, he is some player…

Starrk: That is soooo disgusting…

Razz: Well, is that everyone?

Tosen: There is still Wonderweiss

Grimmjow: Shouldn't he have been first?

Wonderweiss: No, I belong last… I will tell you my secret!

Ulquiorra: He… he's talking?

Wonderweiss: Not only am I not retarded like you all seem to think, but I am actually in charge here!

Razz: Meaning what?

Wonderweiss: I am Aizen's boss, he answers to me, AND all this was my idea, not his!!!

Kris: Aizen? Is this true?

Aizen: It is…

Razz: We've all learnt a lot today, so let's move on to the next dare…

Kris: It's still from Rokka-chan:

_I also dare Ulquiorra to go up to Aizen: call him trash, kick him in the groin, burn all of his hair, put make-up on him , take pictures, and then post the pictures on the internet... HeHeHeHeHeHeHe_

_(p.s. Grimmjow is free to do anything else to Aizen to embarrass him)_

Ulquiorra: Hmmmm… Normally I would not be so keen to do this, but in light of recent revelations, I will complete my task willingly.

Grimmjow: YES!!!! You're gonna pay Aizen!!!!

Aizen: Pay? For what?

Grimmjow: Everything that you may, or may not have done to me ever!

Aizen: Why?

Grimmjow: Why not?

Ulquiorra: **…goes up to Aizen… **TRASH!!! Trashtrashtrash!!!! **…kicks in groin…**

Aizen: Ow! What was that for?

Grimmjow: **…hands Ulquiorra a lighter…**

Ulquiorra: Bwahahahaha!! **…starts burning all of Aizen's hair…**

Aizen: **…hair explodes due to excessive hair product…**

Ulquiorra: Orihime!

Orihime: Y…yes?

Ulquiorra: Do you wear make up?

Orihime: Yeah…. Why?

Ulquiorra: I wish to borrow it

Orihime: **…hands over makeup… **Sure… why?

Ulquiorra: **…starts putting makeup all over Aizen's face…**

Orihime: Oh! I see! When you're finished, you can keep the makeup… I do _**not**_ want it back…

Ulquiorra: **…nods…continues with makeup-ing Aizen…**

Grimmjow: **…goes and locates camera and the interwebs…**

Ulquiorra: Hey look, let's put Byakuya's wedding dress on him!

Grimmjow: You are very evil…

Ulquiorra: **…puts dress on Aizen…takes dozens of photos… **Lovely…

Grimmjow: **…returns with raw fish… shoves half into Aizen's mouth…** Capture _that_ Ulquiorra!

Ulquiorra: **…does so…**

Grimmjow: **...brings over laptop… **hey Razz, can we borrow your facebook account?

Razz: Um… sure thing…

Ulquiorra: **…uploads photos onto facebook…**

Kris: Make sure you tag him!!!

Aizen: **…groans and tries to spit fish out…**

Grimmjow: OHHH!!! So you don't like fishes eh? Well, how do you like this!!!!!?? **…stuffs dog poop in Aizen's ears…**

Ulquiorra: **…claps… **I think it is finished…

Grimmjow: **…surveys masterpiece…**

Razz: Lovely…

Yammy: YAY!!!!!!!!!

Omaeda: The final dare is from the eville pie

_Bwuahahahaha! ok, since I'm in an especially eville mood today, Yachiru go tunnel so much under Byakuya's mansion that it collapses. Tell him that Ichigo did it with Rukia_

Yachiru: YAY! Tunnelling!

Yammy: YAY!!!!!!!!!!

Yachiru: Who are you?

Yammy: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Yachiru: **…gives funny look…goes tunnelling…**

SOMETIME LATER

Razz: Is it just me, or does the ground seem less stable then it was before?

Ichigo: **…shrugs… **I dunno…

Omaeda: Where are we, anyway?

Razz: I don't know!

Byakuya: What are you all doing in my mansion?

Kris: Oh dear…

A great rumbling is heard and slowly, floor by floor, the mansion begins to collapse. Everyone starts panicking and screaming that they will be crushed. Luckily for all involved, two particularly sturdy beams stop the rubble and create a nice little pocket for everyone to sit in.

Kris: Well, this is cosy…

Razz: It's time for the final send off! Vizard, if you would!

Vizard: _On the twelfth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me~_

_Twelve drummers drumming~  
ELEVEN PIPERS PIPING~  
Ten lords a-leaping~_

_NINE LADIES DANCING~  
Eight maids a-milking~_

_SEVEN SWANS A-SWIMMING~_

_Six geese a-laying~_

_FIVE~ GOLDEN~ RINGS~!!!!!!!  
Four calling birds~_

_THREE FRENCH HENS~ _

_Two turtle doves~_

_AND~ A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE~~~!!!!_

…

Grimmjow: Now what?


End file.
